Life of a Monster
by OhJay
Summary: Semi-AU. Zack doesn't die when he went up against ShinRa's army, but was dragged back to Hojo's lab where he's experimented on and turned into a monster. He's able to escape, but will be able to live with himself? ZackxAerith, implied CloudxTifa.
1. I Specimen

_**I Specimen**_

The sky was very cloudy that day, and while the rain kept pouring down onto him, he barely felt it. Zack Fair had made his final stand against ShinRa, and he was now dying from the many gunshot wounds the soldiers had given him. His best friend Cloud sat beside him, Buster Sword in hand.

"I'm your living legacy" Cloud repeated softly.

Zack tried his best to smile faintly, and was about to close his eyes for the final time and begin his peaceful rest, but the sound of a nearby helicopter made him try his best to keep them open. They were coming back, and he could only think of one reason why: Cloud.

"Run" he said between labored breaths.

Cloud took one glance where the noise was coming from, then turned back to his friend. Hesitation was written all over his face.

"Go!" Zack commanded, trying to shout, but barely making it a loud whisper.

_Don't let me die for nothing._

Cloud nodded firmly as he stood up, and to Zack's relief hurried away the best that he could in his body's weak condition. He heard the faint voices of the ShinRa infantrymen that were now nearby, but he didn't care anymore. Cloud was safe, and just knowing that kept him calm.

_I'm sorry Aerith..._

His only regret was not being able to see her one last time, but there wasn't anything he could do about it now, so he slowly closed his eyes, and let everything fade to black. The last thing he remembered was the voices getting closer.

* * *

><p>When you fall asleep, then wake up the next morning it can only seem like a few minutes have past when in reality it's been hours. That's how it was for Zack when he was blinded by a sudden white light. Thinking that he was dead and was passing on to the lifestream he tried to lift his hand and block some of it out so he could see, but found that he couldn't move either of his arms. Panic rushed through him instantly as he began to struggle against the restraints that held him down to the cold metal table, but it didn't do him any good.<p>

_No! No no no no no!_

How could he be back here again? He escaped, he was killed! Glancing around the lab while he continued to struggle he noticed that he wasn't back in ShinRa manor, but ShinRa itself in Hojo's lab.

"You shouldn't have run off like that" a voice said behind him, leaning over him with that smug look on his face that he loathed.

"Hojo" he spat.

"You should be thankful," he began. "I treated your wounds just in time"

"What have you done with Cloud?" he demanded, looking around for him.

"Cloud?" he asked, walking away from the table to grab something from another. "Ah yes, the blonde one, completely useless to me, an utter failure. A disappointment really, I had such high hopes for him as one of my specimens."

Anger and rage boiled in him as Hojo spoke, and he struggled more violently than before hoping that he could get free and strangle him, but at the same time was relieved that Cloud had gotten away safely.

"You on the other hand," Hojo continued, now walking back to the table with a large needle in hand. "Are quite promising, and nearly complete."

Fear coursed through him as Hojo smiled and lifted the needle so Zack could see it. A thick blackish liquid flowed inside it, and sent shivers down his spine. He stopped struggling for a brief moment because of it, giving Hojo enough time to force the injection into his arm. He bit back a scream as the dark liquid began to course through his blood stream, setting every nerve on fire along the way. The pain didn't fade, and he knew there was much more to come.

* * *

><p><em>Please just let me die...<em>

Every day was the same. Two infantrymen would drag him out of the cell he was kept in and take him back to Hojo's lab, where he would be strapped against the steel table, and have more fluids injected into him. With each day the pain got worse, and made him to weak to fight back anymore. He thought for sure whatever Hojo was doing was killing him from the inside.

Tseng visited him in his cell once. He apologized for not being able to stop Hojo from starting the experiments from the beginning in Nibelheim, and said that he did try to stop them from taking him back to the lab as well, but they wouldn't listen to him. The shooting had been a misunderstanding of orders. Since Cloud really was worthless to Hojo, he wanted him officially disposed of. It had been Cloud that they had been told to kill, and Zack was supposed to be taken back to the lab.

"Are they still looking for him?" he asked as he continued to lie on his cot to weak to sit up from the pain.

"No."

He breathed a soft sigh of relief, then clenched his teeth as another sudden spike of pain shot through his body. They had become more frequent recently.

"Here."

He held out a small thin black box to him that had a piece of tape with the word "Sealed" in black bold letterson it to keep it's contents from spilling out. He glanced at it for a moment, then forced himself to sit up when he recognized Aerith's hand writing on the envelopes he saw through the transparent lid. He had found the rest of her letters that she had written him, all eighty eight of them.

"Thank you" he said softly.

He knew that he would be taken back to the lab before he got a chance to read them, so he tucked them under the mattress for safe keeping. From then on just thinking of her kept him going just enough to bear all the pain, and give him a shred of hope that some day he would get out and see her. Still, day after day the experiments continued, until he was once again locked in glass tube full of Mako.

It was then when he started to panic again. How long would he be left in here? How much more of his life was going to rot away thanks to Hojo? He tried to break out, just like he did before, but he was still very weak. After what seemed like a few more days the Mako numbed his pain, but it also made him feel tired, and so he slept most of the time.

* * *

><p>"Is this him?" The President asked as he examined the sleeping Ex-SOLDIER in his Mako tube. "He doesn't look like much" he commented.<p>

If anything he looked like he was on the brink of death. It may have just been the look the Mako gave him, but he looked rather pale. Hojo had promised him that if he got this runaway specimen back, then he could turn him into the most powerful human weapon yet, even greater than Sephiroth. Shinra, getting very impatient because of the recent doings of AVALANCHE wanted to see results immediately.

"Right now he may not, but the process is nearly complete"

"How long?"

"First I need to find a way to make him snap, something that will set off his anger and rage. After that the effects will be instant"

"Just make it quick" he told him heading for the door.

"One more thing" Hojo said, catching his attention once more. "When you're done using the Cetra to find the Promised Land, I would like to repeat this experiment on her as well"

"As long as I get the results I want you can do what you want with her"

* * *

><p>Cetra...Why did that word sound so familiar to him? Zack may have been asleep, but he faintly heard the conversation between Hojo and the President. He opened his eyes halfway to see the green sea of Mako as he thought. Cetra... There was something that he was forgetting, he was sure of it.<p>

_So tired..._

The pain was gone now, completely replaced with that numb feeling. He couldn't feel anything at the moment, he wasn't sure if that was good or bad. He slowly began to close his eyes again to go back to sleep, telling himself that didn't really matter right now when it finally clicked: Cetra; Ancient; Aerith. Hojo was going to experiment on Aerith, and ShinRa was allowing it.

His eyes snapped open, now fully awake as rage suddenly boiled within him. He pounded on the glass with all his might, slightly surprised that it broke with only one hit allowing all the Mako to spill out and giving him a chance to escape.

"I'll kill you!"

Everything after that passed by in a blur, completely unaware of things that he was doing or what was going around him. It wasn't until he heard a specific voice call his name that he snapped out of it. What he saw made his blood suddenly run cold as his anger and rage disappeared as quickly as it came. Cissnei stood in front of him, fear and shock in her amber eyes. In one hand she held her weapon, Rekka, the other clutched at her stomach, blood seeping through her clothes and dripping from her hand. However, what horrified him the most was the amount of blood dripping from his right hand; it was her blood: He had hurt her.

He barely noticed as she dropped her weapon with a loud metal clang and fell to the ground as she died, for he was to busy backing away in shock staring at his blood stained hands. What had he done, what had Hojo done to him? He let out a terrifying scream as he realized that what once had been his hands was now blood stained sharp claws; Hojo had turned him into a monster.

"There he is!"

He glanced up to see three infantrymen down the hallway all aiming their rifles at him, so he ran the opposite direction as they opened fire on him. He tried not to look at all the bloody corpses around as he ran back in the direction of the lab, knowing that he had snapped and done all this, but part of him did wish that Hojo was among them. He wasn't.

He turned the corner and the gunfire grounded to a halt. He wasn't sure if they had run out of ammo, or were planning on chasing him and hunting him down, but he didn't hear any of their footsteps.

"Should we go after him?" asked one.

"No, the other intruder has been made top priority"

He sighed from relief softly as he heard their footsteps retreat away from him, then very quietly headed back to where his cell had been. He wasn't leaving without Aerith's letters.

* * *

><p>There was a single guard near the small prison block. He hadn't expected him, so he was noticed. Zack hadn't meant to kill him like the others, but when he fired his gun at him instinct took over and he swiped him with his claws. He couldn't look after that.<p>

However then he had another minor problem: He forgot which one was his. Taking the guard's keys he opened one of the middle ones, and to his surprise found Cloud silently sleeping by the wall, Tifa on the cot. He blinked in confusion, and then quietly backed away not wanting either of them to see what he had become.

He thought for sure he was in one of the middle cells, so he opened the one across from Cloud's. Sure enough it was his, and he found the box where he left it. He held it carefully not wanted to accidentally break or crush it with his claws, and wondered silently who else was here with Cloud and Tifa. Thanks to his Mako enhanced senses he was able to hear someone snoring loudly in the cell to Cloud's left (most likely male) and slow soft breathing from the one on the right.

He wasn't sure what it was, but something inside him screamed at him to open the door. He hesitated at first, but did so and found his angel unharmed and fast asleep on the cot. Immediately he wanted to go to her, to wrap his arms around her and kiss her passionately as he apologized for being gone so long, but he couldn't. He didn't want her of all people seeing what he had become, he wouldn't be able to live with himself if she did.

"I'm sorry" he whispered, tears coming to his eyes. "I never should have left" he was starting to choke on his words knowing that this would be the last time he ever saw her again, but he was able to get three words out before leaving: "I love you."

And with that he quietly closed the door, but left Cloud's open so he would have a chance to escape.

_**Author's Notes**_

Well, first I'd like to give a super big thank you to **Zythxx **for betaing this, and if any of you are fellow Star Fox fans you should definitely check out his stuff. Anyway, new Zack lives fic, but other than not killing Zack and Aerith off and Zack being a monster experiment I'm not changing much. Most of this is going to take place after Dirge of Cerberus, so there will be spoilers on pretty much everything, and there will also be some mild CloudxTifa fluff (I'm mainly focusing on ZackxAerith for this one)_**. **_Other than that, I hope you guys like this so far, and please review. __

**I**

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	2. II The Price of Freedom

_**II The Price of Freedom**_

As he made his escape everything was unusually quiet, but when his enhanced Mako hearing picked up the screams and gunfire above on the higher floors he guessed that whoever the intruder was, was up there heading towards the president, doing some serious damage on the way. Thus he was able to make his way to the back stairs quietly without being noticed. Of course due to his rotten luck, that stopped once he actually reached them.

"Zack?"

He stiffened at the voice, and debated whither to just ignore him and make a run for it, or turn around and face him. How would his friend react to him now? He was supposedly dead, and now thanks to Hojo a monster. He sighed, knowing that even if he tried to make a run for it his friend would just follow him until he got some answers.

"Hey Kunsel" he said without turning around. "Been a while huh"

There was none of his usual cheerfulness in his voice anymore, it was like someone had taken it away from his very soul. Why did he have to show up now of all times? Why did one of his closest friends have to see what he had become?

"Hojo did this to you didn't he?" Kunsel asked as he approached him slowly and cautiously.

"Yeah..."

He clenched his fist tightly, anger rising just hearing his name. Kunsel saw this and took a step back, but saw Zack calm down a moment later so he knew it was safe. They both glanced up worriedly when they heard more gunfire from above, and Zack decided it was time to leave. However as he opened the door to the stairwell, Kunsel placed a hand on his shoulder.

"I'm coming with you" he told him.

Zack looked back at his friend and smiled faintly, remembering the messages he had gotten from him while he was on the run with Cloud saying he would leave ShinRa in an instant if it was to help him. He hadn't dared to reply to any of them knowing that they could be traced, but apparently he had meant every word he said, and while he saw the look of shock and fear on his face he could tell that he was trying to look past what he had become.

"Thanks" Zack whispered.

* * *

><p>One of the things he liked about Kunsel was that he didn't push questions on him, even though Zack knew that he was probably dying for answers. Zack however, wanted to know what ShinRa had been up to. His eyes had been opened up for a while now when Banora had been destroyed and he now saw how corrupt they were getting, but back then he was still young, ignorant, and refused to believe it. Since Kunsel seemed to know anything and everything about ShinRa, it just seemed natural.<p>

"So what's ShinRa been up to these past five years?" he asked as they hurried down the stairs.

"There's a new anti ShinRa group around that'd been giving them a lot of trouble"

"Another AVALANCHE?" he asked.

"Yeah. Already they've blown up two of Midgar's reactors, and in response ShinRa blew up the Sector Seven plate support and blamed it on them."

Zack's eyes widened in shock as he took it all in. Would they really have gone that far? As he continued down the steps he clenched his fist in anger, and hated himself for not realizing how corrupt ShinRa was from the beginning.

He sighed as they walked out the building and glanced down at his claws once more. If he had realized it sooner and done something about it, then maybe he wouldn't have ended up like this…

* * *

><p>"You sure this is smart?" he asked when they got to Kunsel's apartment in Sector Eight. "Won't they come after you after they find out you've deserted?"<p>

"With all the chaos that happened back there they could easily mistake me for MIA. If not, I'm sure they've got better problems than hunting down a deserter or two"

Zack nodded as he walked inside, hoping he was right. His apartment was a small one bedroom, but Kunsel kept it insanely clean and rather roomy, which made it seem bigger. The living room only consisted of a wooden coffee table and a cough facing the flat screen TV on the wall, while the small eat in kitchen just had a small folding table and chairs as well as a fridge, stove, and sink. White carpet was through out most of it, and the white tile in the kitchen and bathroom matched it. The walls were also white washed, and bare.

"Bathroom's down the hall, I'll go see if I have some extra clothes that fit you"

Zack nodded, slipped off his combat boots, and immediately headed towards it realizing that he hadn't had a decent shower in five years...Ugh, he tried to think about that to much. He shut the door behind him when he got there, and did something that he knew he would regret, but would have to face sooner or later: The mirror.

As expected, his SOLDIER uniform was splattered with blood, most of it not his, and the shirt still had the bullet holes he had received from the battle with the infantrymen. Naturally his blood covered claws stood out to him, but for the first time he also noticed that he had a single black demonic looking wing.

"_If people had wings, they'd be monsters"_

"_Wings symbolize freedom for those who have none, they don't symbolize monsters"_

He shook the memories of his old conversation with Cissnei away as he peeled off his clothes and stepped in the shower. The hot water and steam felt good on his skin as he scrubbed off all the blood, dirt, and grime on him and sent it down the drain. He washed everything twice to make sure he got it all, then spent a few minutes just letting himself relax as the water came down onto him. If only the water could wash away the rest of his problems as well.

When he stepped out and dried himself off he noticed Kunsel had left a pair of black cotton pants and a gray hoodie by the door, so he slipped them on. It was more than a little uncomfortable having his wing tucked into his shirt, but he didn't want to make a hole in it, so he just dealt with it. Hiding his claws however was another issue. He thought his black leather gloves could do the trick, but apparently he had dropped them on his rampage somewhere 'cause he didn't have them. He sighed as he looked in the mirror once more, but was glad he at least looked more human than an actual monster. He didn't talk to Kunsel any more that night, he just went straight to the couch and crashed, hoping that this was all a dream.

_Well Zack, you wanted freedom. I guess this was the price..._

* * *

><p>For the next few days he didn't talk to Kunsel much. He didn't push anything on him, which he was grateful for, but Kunsel would often ask him if he wanted to talk about anything, seeing that he was depressed like never before. No longer did Zack laugh and joke like he used to, and all his smiles could easily be seen through as forced or fake. He wasn't even this bad after Angeal's death.<p>

What Kunsel didn't know about were the nightmares that haunted Zack night after night. It was always the same; him, breaking out of his Mako prison to kill Hojo, but unknowingly killing a dozen others instead. Cissnei would call his name to try and snap him out of it, and would die by his hand because of it. He would then wake and bolt up sweating, unable to go back to sleep afterwords, for his body didn't require it now.

He would usually sneak out and take walks along the streets of Midgar instead, or gaze up at the stars, something he often did back when he was on the run and couldn't sleep.

"I guess this is how you felt huh Angeal" he told the sky one night.

He now understood why Angeal made him kill him, how he had really been on the edge and couldn't take it anymore, but he had never been a monster like he thought he was, not to Zack.

"Please, just tell me what to do!"

He needed him now more than ever. He had never felt so alone in his life, for there wasn't anyone who could relate to him. He felt like he didn't belong anymore, not in Midgar, not anywhere. He stood there gazing up at the sky, hoping that he would get some sort of sign or answer, but nothing came. They never did.

* * *

><p>One week passed, and with each day Zack grew closer to his breaking point. The dreams were getting more vivid, more frighting. Enough was enough he decided. When he couldn't take it anymore one night, he decided to end it all.<p>

Instead of going out on another walk like he had done every night before he went into the bathroom and locked the door behind him. He rolled up the sleeves of the hoodie that Kunsel had lent him, then removed his new custom made leather gloves that hid his claws rather well. He pulled the towel off the rack and set it on the floor by the wall neatly before he sat down and leaned his head back.

He sat there silently for what seemed like an eternity to him, trying his best to ignore his conscience that was screaming at him not to do this. He didn't listen, he didn't think monsters usually did. He took one last deep breath, then dug his claws into his left arm. He clenched his teeth as he felt the pain, and the warmth of his blood start to spill out from within, but he kept going. By the end he already felt tired, and his vision was starting to get hazy and dancing with black spots. He set his arm down on the towel beside him, purposely put there so Kunsel wouldn't have to clean up a big mess.

"You call yourself SOLDIER?"

Angeal stood in front of him, white wings extended, buster sword in hand, gazing down on him pitifully.

"You tarnish the SOLDIER name"

"Shut up" Zack told his hallucination.

"Where's your honor Zack?" the illusion asked him. "What happened to your dreams?"

"Monsters don't have dreams and honor"

He closed his eyes, willing him to go away, but while he did, Kunsel then decided to show up.

"Zack? You ok in there?"

He could hear him jostle the locked doorknob from the other side, worry in his voice.

"I'm fine Kunsel" he told him.

He was more than fine, soon he would die and all his pain would go away. He wouldn't have to deal with anything anymore. Part of him wondered if monsters like him still went to the lifestream, but he decided that he didn't really care as long as it all ended for him.

"Zack open the door!"

He guessed he could probably smell his blood with his SOLDIER senses.

_You're to late Kunsel._

Already he could feel death starting to take him. Everything was slowly starting to fade away into darkness, so he closed his eyes and waited for it to come.

* * *

><p>Kunsel had gotten up because he had heard some noise. At first he thought it could be a burglar trying to break in, so he grabbed his sword just in case, but when he saw that Zack wasn't on the cough, and heard him talking to himself in the bathroom he relaxed and set his weapon aside. He was about to go back to his room when the smell of blood sudden hit him, and he instantly became worried.<p>

"Zack? You ok in there?"

He jostled the doorknob; locked.

"I'm fine Kunsel"

He was lying, he could tell by his tone.

"Zack open the door!"

Had Zack really been that close to his breaking point? Would he really try and kill himself. He wanted to deny it, but the evidence right now was strong. Things were now silent on the other side, and he cursed under his breath. With one hard shove he was able to force the door open, breaking the lock, and saw his friend unconscious up against the wall.

"Zack you idiot!"

It had been just as he feared, he had tried to end his own life. He had carved the word "Monster" into his arm with his claws, making blood flow from the wound.

"I'm not going to let you die like this"

He had only been unconscious for a few moments, which meant there was still time to save him.

_**Author's Notes**_

I tried to drag things out so it wouldn't seemed rushed again, but I'm not really sure I succeeded... _**  
><strong>_

For anyone who's wondering, I'm not going to make Zack go all emo. Depressed sure, but he's not gonna be like Cloud was in Advent Children or Dissidia (Get defeated as Cloud in that game and he reeks of emoness). Also, there seems to be some minor confusion of what Zack did at the end of the last chapter. For those of you that have actually played FFVII, remember that one part where Cloud and the others get captured trying to rescue Aerith, and then the next morning the guard outside was killed and Cloud's door is open? Well that was my explanation for that, I just forgot to mention it last chapter *sweatdrops*


	3. III Reason to Live

_**III Reason to Live**_

Zack's eyes snapped open, the fluorescent lights overhead blinding him temporarily. He turned his head to the side and noticed a heart monitor, its steady beep reassuring him that he was still alive. Kunsel had saved him after all.

_Damn it._

He glanced down at his left arm, which was now tightly bandaged to prevent him from bleeding any further, while the IV lines in his right arm replaced the blood and Mako he had lost.

"Why'd you do that?" Kunsel sat by his bed, looking down at him with worried eyes, but unlike his expression, his voice revealed a hidden anger.

"You know why, " he answered him, turning away. He felt Kunsel grab his chin and forcing him up so he could see the anger that now burned in Kunsel's eyes. Zack felt himself being grabbed up by his shirt and could now see the anger in his eyes."

"Listen to me Zack: You. Are. Not. A. Monster."

"Then tell me, tell me what I have to live for now!"

Kunsel's eyes softened immediately. Silence passed between them for a moment as the machine continued its steady beep. Zack's hardened gaze met that of his friend. Kunsel's hand relaxed its grip, and he went to sit back down, silently.

"That's what I thought, " Zack muttered coldly as he tried his best to roll over without yanking the IV

Zack was allowed to leave after the IV infusion was done, after which started a long period of awkward silence for him and Kunsel that lasted for days. They barely spoke to each other at all, but Kunsel kept a close eye on Zack to make sure he didn't make any more suicide attempts.

Most nights he couldn't sleep, for fear of the nightmares that sleep would bring, Instead he read each and every one of Aerith's letters as he gazed outside to the stars.

Not a day went by without him thinking about her, wondering how she was doing, hoping she was alright. He still thought about death often, about ending his pain, but he knew Kunsel wouldn't let it happen. He just had to bare it until he died naturally.

"Zack you can't just keep moping around like this." Kunsel had been telling him this constantly, but Zack usually just ignored him.

"Well what do you want me to do then?" Zack asked, rather annoyed.

"It's Midgar, there's bound to be some kind of legal work that doesn't have any ties to ShinRa"

Zack realized that Kunsel was starting to sound like his parents, telling him to get off his lazy ass and get a job, a _real _job. When he thought about it, a job might be helpful. He needed something to distract himself from all his pain, but the question was what kind of work was he going to find? Then he remembered what he had told Cloud when they were on the truck just miles away from Midgar. He said that he would become a mercenary, and while he had mostly been joking around at the time, it seemed rather reasonable now.

* * *

><p>Meteor appeared in the sky a few days later. Zack had been taking odd jobs up 'til then as a mercenary, putting on fake smiles for Kunsel, but still not speaking to him that much. When it was apparent that Meteor was going to destroy the planet, people began to panic, while others soon accepted that it was inevitable and prepared for their deaths.<p>

"I'm going to Gongaga" he told Kunsel, his heart heavy.

He knew where he had to go, but he didn't want to go without Aerith. He rued his current form, hating the people who had done this to him—taken away his freedom to see the woman he loved. If the world was really doomed to end along with him he at least wanted his final resting place to be where he grew up, and his parents needed to know that he was still alive. He just had to hide what he had become, but as long as he kept his gloves and sweatshirt on they probably wouldn't notice. He would just have to hope for the best.

"Alright" Kunsel told him, also making plans to go back home to Junon.

It didn't take long for him to pack his things to take with him. It was mostly clothes, but he also took Aerith's letters. As he slung his sack over his shoulder and headed towards the door, he took one look back at his friend. Knowing that this would be the last time he saw him, he knew that he had to say something.

"You were a good friend Kunsel. Thanks for being there for me."

He hesitated for a moment, and drew his best friend into a tight hug. Kunsel hesitated for a moment, but wrapped his arms around his friend. There was no time to let the situation be awkward.

"It was an honor," he answered. "Just… take care of yourself."

Zack let out a short laugh.

"The world's ending," he reminded his friend. "No matter what, I can't take care of myself."

They let the weight of his words sink in. Until then they hadn't allowed themselves to let the severity of the situation set in. Almost unconsciously, they both felt the others arms tighten around him, although neither of the men was aware of his own tightening grip around his best friend. After a short while, Kunsel let go. He clapped Zack on the shoulder. He couldn't find words to express what he felt. Words failing him, and his pride keeping him from spilling out his heart, he kept it simple.

"Thanks for everything." Zack smiled.

He saw the sentiment in his friend's eye, and understood everything left unsaid. With a nod, he affirmed all of Kunsel's sentiments.

"You too."

Then he left, and never looked back as he made his way back to his hometown.

* * *

><p>Angeal had been right; flying was amazing. He hadn't really tried it before, but figured it would save a lot of time getting there if he did, so when he was a couple miles outside of Midgar he took off his hoodie and stretched out his wing before leaping up and taking off. He let out an exhilarating scream as he soared, feeling the wind on his face and blow through his hair as the landscape below flew by.<p>

However it being his first flight he only made it about half way to Junon before he wore himself out. He stopped to rest for the night, then was able to find a boat that would take him to the port near Gongaga once he got to Junon. He thanked them as soon as they were on the other continent, then continued his way back home. He stopped about a half a mile outside the village, and took his time to make sure his wing was tucked into his hoodie nicely and his gloves were on before he walked into town. He took a nice deep breath as he took in the nice open air that he missed as he walked into town, taking in what had changed over the years.

From his last visit, he remembered the remains of the town's Mako reactor. On the outskirts of the village he noticed a small cemetery for those who died in the accident. He looked away for he was afraid there might be someone he knew.

_It's ShinRa's fault, _he told himself, clenching his fists in anger. If only he had seen them for what they were sooner, then maybe he could've done something about it. _At least they'll die with everyone else. _He would be able to die with ease just knowing that.

Other than that the scenery was still the same. The village was surrounded by greenery, whether it was the jungle around it, or the grass that covered the hills. However, since it was nearing autumn the colors were starting to change and the weather was becoming chilly. He was actually kind of glad it wasn't scorching hot, that way he could leave his hoodie and gloves on without it seeming a little suspicious or weird.

He approached his parents' house nervously, beginning to rethink the whole idea. Surely ShinRa had sent them notice saying that he had been KIA. How, would they react when they saw him? He didn't want to give them a heart attack, and he was sure that if either of them found out that he was a monster that would happen. He hesitated as he raised his hand to knock, but knew that this would be his last chance to see them so he knocked lightly and patiently waited for an answer.

It was his mother who came to the door. She was in her late forties, about a foot shorter than he was with short graying hair and a casual long blue denim skirt and white button down blouse. She wore a plain white apron over her clothes, and by the good smell coming from the kitchen it was safe to assume she was baking something. She gasped and grew pale when she saw him, like he was a ghost, but that was expected.

"It's me mom, " he told her calmly. "It's Zack"

He half expected her to faint from shock, but instead she wrapped her arms around him tightly as tears fell from her eyes. He took his shoes off and set them by the door as he walked in, remembering that it was one of his mother's pet peeves.

"They told us you were MIA" she told him as he sat down at the kitchen table taking everything in.

The delicious smell coming from the oven told him that a pie was on its way, and made his stomach growl while his ears picked up soft snoring from upstairs, probably his father taking a nap. Overall it was the same as he remembered from his childhood. The floors were all clean polished wood, while the walls were painted white and lined with shelves for pictures.

"ShinRa's been lying a lot lately" he told her. "I wouldn't believe much they say right now if I were you."

Just talking about ShinRa brought all of the bad memories back to the surface again. Killing Angeal, the destruction of Banora, and all the lies that followed. He clenched his fists in anger, feeling the stiff material of his gloves tighten. His mother frowned as she noticed his anger, and gently placed a hand over his.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, " she said calmly. "You're here now, and that's all that matters."

* * *

><p>He spent the next few days just catching up with them and talking about all the good times that he had since he had left. Meteor came closer, reminding everyone that their time was almost up, but no one spoke about it out loud. At night Zack would continue to gaze up at the sky as he re-read Aerith's letters, wondering how she was doing and regretting that he wouldn't see her ever again.<p>

The night it finally fell he was outside, determined and ready to watch it until death came and took him like everyone else. He stood there on the edge of the cliff overlooking the village, his eyes focused in the direction of Midgar, Where Meteor seemed to be the closest.

Thinking about all of the people that would perish, he decided he couldn't watch anymore, so he closed his eyes and waited. But fate wouldn't have it that way. The Lifestream fought against Meteor that night, and with the help of Holy destroyed it and saved the planet. He saw it all happen, and yelled at the sky in frustration for it. Three times now something had gotten between him and death. It was as if not even death wanted him.

"Fine then, have it your way," he said angrily.

* * *

><p>After spending a week in Gongaga, he started to feel weak again, and the pain he felt in the lab was starting to come back. His mother noticed that he was getting a little pale, but he lied and said he was fine. Not wanting to die in front of his family, he knew that he had to get back to Midgar immediately, so he packed up his things and told them that he wanted to with the rebuilding of Midgar. They were sad to see him leave, but he hugged them both as he said goodbye and promised to keep in touch. Then he left his hometown, and began to fly back to Midgar as soon as the village was out of sight.<p>

Time flew by quickly He decided to become a mercenary after all, and often helped out the World Regenesis Organization when Reeve asked him to.

Before he knew it, three years went by. In that time period he had helped clean up what was left of Midgar and build parts of Edge, taken care of any monster problems that occurred in the area, and fought in the brief but brutal war against deep group as a regular WRO soldier.

Now that he had gotten back up on his own two feet and was once again trying to live his life despite his condition, he had settled down alone in Edge. Occasionally he would catch a glimpse of Cloud as he went out for his deliveries, or Aerith as she started to sell flowers again, but he didn't dare get close to them. He was often tempted to, for he longed to be with the girl he loved once more and to know how Cloud was, but he couldn't bring himself to get near them. It was the same with his parents: He was afraid of what they would think of him. He decided that it would be best to remain dead to them.

As more time passed by, he got over being suicidal, and acted more like his old self, laughing at jokes and putting on smiles while he was around people, but only because Kunsel still kept an eye on him. On the inside he was still hurting. Fate still had other things in store for him. He had been walking back to his apartment after running a few errands when a voice from behind called his name.

"Zack."

He recognized it as Tseng's and was going to just ignore him and keep going, but he had a feeling that he wouldn't leave him alone so easily. For the most part ShinRa had left him alone, so he did the same, but if Tseng wanted to talk to him then he figured it had to be important.

"What is it?" he asked as he turned to face him.

"I have a job for you."

As always he sounded rather calm, but the slightly worried look in his eyes told him that it was indeed serious.

_**Author's Notes**_

I'm really sorry it took so long, but I had some pre graduation/finals work to do, and I've had four emotional breakdowns in the past week from all the stress (I have like 1-2 a year if any). I also had a lot of editing of this chapter since I changed by mind about a lot of plot wise stuff and ended up cutting it out.

I'd like to give a super big thank you to **Chibipinkbunny **for doing a very good job at beta reading this chapter when I was paranoid that it sucked, and another big thanks to **Lunch Sur Cannibal **for helping me edit when I had a bad case of black.. I hope it's a lot better now.

I know I skipped a lot, but I didn't wanna focus on FFVII, AC, or DoC's plots. There's already a lot of that out there, and it would probably bore me really quickly since it's already pretty much written out in a away.

Now to clear up any further confusion, just a reminder that AERITH DID NOT DIE IN THIS FIC. My reasoning? If Cloud got all emo over it, think of what it would've done to Zack. Sure it would add to angst and stuff, but not this fic, maybe others. Also, if anyone's wondering about Cloud, he will show up for a bit in the next chapter, as will Tifa (Aerith will soon, I promise).

Speaking of which, I have not gotten chapter four back from **Zythxx **yet, but like me he's insanely busy with pre graduation stuff and he's apologized for not getting to it yet, but he will soon. After that I don't think I'll have much to do for the final edit, so it'll be up shortly afterwards. Until then, PLEASE review (the lack of feedback I'm getting is lowing my motivation for this here, which will mean slower updates if it continues).


	4. IV Revenge and Close Calls

_**IV Revenge and Close Calls**_

"Have a seat Zack," Tseng offered kindly when they got to his office at the newly rebuilt ShinRa building.

"If this has anything to do with me coming back to SOLDIER, I'm not interested," Zack told him as he sat down.

ShinRa had changed, or so they said. Rufus had formally apologized for the things in the past that his company had done, and permanently shut down and dismantled all of the Mako reactors around the world. These days, most things were solar or lunar powered, but it was taking time to switch things over to natural renewable resources.

Kunsel had hesitated at first, but went back to SOLDIER a few months ago. According to him they really had changed their ways, and while Zack trusted his friend on that, he turned down any and all offers he received for him to come back. He would never be able to forgive them for what they did. No amount of apologies could make amends.

"No," Tseng told him, making Zack a little curious to why he had been summoned.

"We have some Intel that we thought would interest you."

"I'm listening then," Zack said calmly.

Before Tseng could tell him the door opened behind them, making Zack glance back a bit uneasily. It was just Reno, so he relaxed a bit, but noticed the icy glare that the red-headed Turk was aiming at him which made him tense.

"What's he doing here?" he said coldly, continuing to glare at him.

"He deserves to know more than anyone else, Reno."

"Have you forgotten what he did to Cissnei?" he shouted, sparking both anger and regret in Zack. "A monster like him should be-"

But he didn't get to finish. Zack's infuriation rose dramatically in milliseconds, and in a flash he stood up and shoved Reno into the wall before he could even blink.

"You think I killed Cissnei on purpose, that I wanted this?" Zack yelled in his face. "I think about what I did to her every damn day!"

He punched his left fist into the wall right next to Reno's face, making Reno flinch as well as creating a large dent in the wall, but also made him see the faded scars of his previous suicidal attempt. Silence passed between them as Reno glanced at the scars, rather surprised at the evidence of Zack's suicidal attempt, then shut his mouth and lowered his head in guilt. Zack let him go, then headed towards the door.

"Zack, wait." Tseng said as Zack opened the door to leave.

"What?" he asked in annoyance, still trying to calm down so he wouldn't snap and hurt someone.

"It's Hojo. He's alive."

Those four words froze him. Anger, fear, and the sudden need for revenge all came up inside him at once. He tried to remain as calm as he could, and took a deep breath to help. Knowing that he could snap at any given moment if he didn't, and as he turned around he saw Tseng taking out a manila file folder and placing it on the desk.

Zack carefully opened it, and flipped through a couple of pictures taken from a helicopter of Hojo walking into ShinRa Manor in Nibelheim. Some of them were blurry, and there wasn't one with a decent shot of his face, but he could tell by the way he hunched over and knew that greasy, long, black pony tail anywhere. There was no doubt in his mind that it was him.

"When were these taken?" he asked.

"Yesterday."

That was all he needed to know.

* * *

><p>Going back to Nibelheim brought back many painful memories for Cloud, so that's why he tried to avoid going back there as much as possible. However, the day after Hojo had been sighted, Cloud had a delivery to make for someone in the village. He could've politely turned it down, but he had other deliveries to make in Rocket town, and since it wasn't to terribly far away he decided to take the job and get it over with.<p>

He parked Fenrir on the outskirts of the village, not bothering to take out any of his swords since he was only going to be there for a few minutes. Memories of his childhood flooded him as he looked at the village entrance, but he also remembered it burning. Sephiroth killing everyone he could as it all was reduced to ashes was the only thing that stood out in his mind anymore, it covered up all the happy memories he had here.

_I never should've taken this job..._

The village had stayed as ShinRa had rebuilt it, but the people they had put there to cover up the entire incident that happened eight years ago had all moved elsewhere, and it was now filled with regular residents. He sighed to himself as he shook away the memories, and carefully lifted the small square package that he was supposed to give to one of the villagers. He had been so lost in his past that he didn't see the dark figure come out of the shadows and slowly walk towards him from behind. All he felt was a sudden hard blow to the back of his head, then everything faded to black as he fell.

* * *

><p><em>Isn't that Cloud's bike?<em>

Zack had caught a glimpse of it from the air, and since he was already close enough to the village he decided to land and check it out. He had only been able to see brief glimpses of his friend in Edge since he still didn't want to be found out, but he knew his sleek black custom job motorcycle anywhere.

He frowned as he recognized it up close. He now knew that Cloud was in the village for some reason, and could spot him if he just waltzed right in. Not wanting to risk it, he took the long way around the village to the mansion instead of cutting through it. As he got closer his anger and rage at Hojo started to come back, so he removed his gloves and flexed his claws. Hojo was going to pay.

The front gate was open, so he just walked right in. It was just how he remembered it: Dark, dusty and crawling with monsters. He guessed that Hojo was downstairs in the basement laboratory, working on some sick new experiment. Zack made his way up the stairs, locating the secret passageway within the stone wall by memory.

He didn't bother climbing down the ladder, he just jumped down and headed towards the lab, eager to get his revenge. A few minor monsters got in his way, but he easily cut them down and continued on. The door to the lab was partially open, so he quietly peaked around the corner. He wanted to make sure that he was actually in there, and there weren't any unfriendly surprises waiting for him.

Hojo stood there over the cold steel table that Zack had once been restrained against. He took a closer look and saw Cloud unconscious and restrained while Hojo prepared to inject the all-too-familiar black liquid into him. He didn't waste a second in jumping into action.

He took Hojo by surprise as he barged in and roughly shoved him against the wall. Zack knocked the syringe out of his hand in the process, and had a tight grip on his throat, but loose enough so Hojo could breath. Zack wasn't going to kill him just yet.

"Remember me?" he growled, looking into his eyes with pure anger and hatred.

Hojo didn't seem to be afraid at all; he just looked at him and laughed.

"Ah yes, the little runaway specimen from project SM. Specimen ZF-001, I presume?"

"Shut up!" he spat as he tightened his grip. "I have a name, and I'm not some experiment any more!"

Hojo made gagging noises as he spoke, obviously choking, but Zack didn't care. With one swift stroke of his claws across his chest he ended his life, then dropped him to the ground as a pool of blood began to surround his corpse. He stood there silently for a moment, staring down at him and making sure that he was really dead. The monster inside him wished that Zack had tortured him a bit more; made Hojo's death slow and painful. He had thought about it, slowly dragging his claws deep into his chest and pulling down until he pleaded for him to end it, but he wouldn't have it that way. Hojo's death had been rather smooth and quick, his honor wouldn't let him with the alternative.

He checked for a pulse just to be on the safe side, and once he felt none he went over to Cloud and undid the restraints that held him to the table. He would come back and grab the syringe he had to see if he could find out what exactly is was that Hojo has injected into him, as well as any notes around about the project he was apart of. However, right now his highest priority was getting Cloud out before he woke up.

He had a strong sense of De ja' vu as he gently lifted his old friend onto his back, and chuckled at the irony. Everything was coming around full-circle now.

"Ironic, huh, Cloud?" he muttered.

They got out without any problems, and Zack went around the village once more to where Fenrir was. He decided it would be best to just leave him there since he would most likely wake up any minute now, but would watch in the shadows until he did, just to make sure he was alright.

"Be safe now, you hear?" he told him as he set him down on the bike.

He smiled as he ruffled his hair a bit, then with a gentle pat on the back as a goodbye, he left.

* * *

><p>Cloud groaned as he began to wake up and come to his senses. Overall he was fine, but his head still ached where he had been clubbed, and he was very confused to what had happened. He remembered being knocked unconscious from someone in the shadows, but here he was in the exact same place with all of his belongings. Fenrir was all in one piece, and he still had his wallet, phone, and keys, which meant it hadn't been any kind of robbery.<p>

He frowned as he picked up the package he was still supposed to deliver off the ground, and tried to put the pieces together. What kind of person just knocked someone out for the hell of it? He tried to remember anything from before his blackout, but all that came was a bunch of blurry voices.

"_Be safe now, you hear?"_

That, however, was loud and clear to him, and he recognized the voice perfectly, but it still didn't make any sense. Zack was dead, so why would he be hearing his voice all of the sudden?

_I must be going insane… _

He decided to just shrug it all off for now, and think about it on the way home. He went into the village and delivered the package without any problems or complaints, but as he was leaving the village a loud distant explosion startled him and all of the villagers. A few of them ran towards it to see what had happened, so he followed to make sure no one was hurt.

Even though it had only been a few moments there was already a small crowd gathered near the flames, and even though Cloud was stuck in the back it was easy to tell that ShinRa manor was burning. They contained the fire so it wouldn't spread to the village, but they let the old mansion burn to the ground.

* * *

><p>Zack had gone back for the syringe as planned, and since he had some time he went ahead and looked around for any notes Hojo had about project SM. He searched the place from top to bottom, but found nothing. He let out a frustrated groan as he kicked the wall, and decided it would be best to destroy the place. Nothing good had come out of it for anyone, and ShinRa had abandoned it years ago anyway. Surely they wouldn't complain too much.<p>

He fled before his explosion went off and attracted attention, and got back to Edge that night. He was tired, but that was mainly because he was due for another transfusion pretty soon, and all of that flying had sapped a lot of his energy. He still never got sleepy, and nightmares still haunted his dreams.

It was after a long day like this that he wanted a drink, so instead of heading straight home he walked around until he found a open bar. He didn't glance up at the sign as he walked in, and even if he did he would have only wondered why _Seventh Heaven _ sounded vaguely familiar. As he walked in no one paid any attention to him, and he did the same in return. He just kept his head low, sat down at the bar and quietly ordered a beer. The bartender brought it to him a moment later and he muttered a "Thank you," but as he picked up his glass he noticed that she was still in front of him.

"Do I know you?" she asked curiously.

He glanced up for a moment when he heard her voice, realizing it was familiar, but he couldn't quite place it. He mentally cursed when he saw it was Tifa, and quickly lowered his head trying not to panic.

"No" he lied calmly, hoping that she wouldn't recognize him.

She continued to look down at him for a moment, but didn't press any more questions on him, and moved on to her other customers. He breathed a sigh of relief as she walked away, then finished his drink and put the gil on the table before leaving quietly. That had been to close for comfort.

_**Author's Notes**_

First, a big thank you to **shippudenfanatic** for beta reading this, and another thank you for everyone who gave me wonderful reviews. It really helped my motivation. Unfortunately, I am sorry to say that I am still not done with chapter five (I've been working on it since I posted this fic) so it's probably gonna be a week or two before I can get it up. I'm almost done with it, but I wanna go back and edit an entire scene before I send it off to my beta reader. Plus even though that it is Summer, I still have to find a summer job, and finish up some cosplay stuff. Plus this time of year is the only time I have to chill and get caught up on some anime, so writing's not the highest on my list (it's up there though).

For those of you that have played Dirge of Cerberus, I am well aware of the giant plot whole surrounding Hojo, but for the story's sake were just gonna say that that whole confusing fragment business didn't happen. For those that have no clue what I'm talking about, good.

Until the next chapter, please keep giving me some feedback, and really does help.


	5. V Breakout

_**V Breakout**_

After Zack got home he decided to try his luck with sleeping. None of his nightmares haunted him that night. In the morning he was awoken early the next morning by his phone ringing. Since he had a mild headache from the alcohol and was too lazy to get up and answer it, he just let it go to voice mail.

About an hour later he did get up, but didn't check his phone until he showered and had some breakfast. It had been Tseng, but he hadn't left any messages for him so he guessed it wasn't that important. Still, he supposed it was about how he handled Hojo and blew up the mansion, so he decided it would be best to call back. Tseng picked up on the first ring, and didn't even bother saying hello.

"I see that you decided to get rid of the mansion."

Zack scratched the back of his head, a nervous habit that had never broken.

"Yeah, well, I figured you guys wouldn't mind since it's been abandoned for a while now. As far I know nothing good has ever come out of that place," he said calmly.

"You're not in trouble Zack, but now the citizens in Nibelheim are a bit suspicious."

Zack sighed. He hadn't really thought about the attention it would attract at the time, he had just wanted to get rid of the place.

"I assume you got the job done beforehand?" Tseng asked.

"He was long dead before I even thought about destroying the place, trust me."

"Good. There's something I'd like for you to look into."

Zack frowned, but decided to at least hear him out. He didn't have much else to do.

"I'm listening then."

"There's been an outbreak in monster activity in the Corel area, and we've lost contact with both the WRO team and the SOLDIER First Class we sent in to investigate. I'd like you to look into it."

Sounded perfectly reasonable, but one thing was bothering him in the back of his mind. He knew that he probably wouldn't want to know the answer, but he asked anyway.

"Who was the SOLDIER you sent?"

"Kunsel."

That was all he needed to know to get moving.

* * *

><p>He got his equipment and materia together quickly, then headed towards the ShinRa building. There he boarded a helicopter with two infantrymen that would accompany him to the Corel area. Tseng had told him that they had lost contact with the WRO squad about ten miles south of the town, and that was where Kunsel had been sent as well.<p>

The whole flight Zack sat there in silence, fidgeting with worry. He tapped his fingers against the seat as he watched the landscape go by, half wanting to just jump out and fly the rest of the way himself. As they finally started to land, Zack didn't waste any time and jumped out when it was still ten feet in the air. He couldn't wait any longer, and started walking ahead.

The silence bothered him greatly, for it usually wasn't a good sign. He took his gloves off as his eyes scanned the area for anything lurking in the shadows. He thought about calling out to his friend, but he knew that it could also attract the unwanted attention of the monster he was looking for. If possible, he wanted to take it by surprise.

He started to walk forward slowly, eyes darting left and right, keeping his guard up. He didn't like the dark feeling he got at all. The infantrymen behind him both had their guns ready as they walked on.

The three of them stopped when they got to a clearing. Zack's eyes widened when he saw the corpses of the missing WRO troops littered about, all of them covered in blood. His eyes scanned each of them quickly, then finally landed on the one in a black SOLDIER uniform.

"Search for any survivors!" Zack told them as he ran over to his friend, hoping that he was still alive.

He sighed from relief as he felt his pulse and saw that he seemed to breathing normally, but Kunsel did seem to be quite injured. There were various cuts and bruises on him, (some of them more severe than others), and his left leg was also bent at an awkward angle. It was safe to assume that it was broken.

Kunsel groaned as Zack looked over his wounds, and slowly opened his eyes.

"Z-Zack...?" he said weakly.

"Don't push yourself," Zack told him.

"Monster...It killed them all, headed towards town…"

Zack clenched his fist and mentally swore, but tried his best to remain calm and focused. It wasn't good to charge into battle blinded by anger and rage, especially since he could snap and go on a rampage easily. A whole village could be getting slaughtered just like Nibelheim, and he was already afraid that he could be too late.

"There are no survivors, sir," one of the infantrymen said as they came over.

"He needs medical attention, and the monster is heading towards civilization. I'm going after it."

Trusting that Kunsel would now be safe, he ran off towards the town.

* * *

><p>From above, the town looked alright. After Meteor fell and ShinRa got back on their feet and forever changed their ways the company had formally apologized for destroying the village and reducing its people to poor, broken, and living in rusty metal shacks. With compensation from ShinRa, and help from the WRO, the village was fully rebuilt to its original state.<p>

That was what he was hoping to see: a nice, quiet, peaceful little village going about like it usually did everyday, but it was a gruesome sight. It may not have been in flames like Nibelheim, but the bloody corpses scattered about and broken in houses were the same. He was too late after all.

He could tell that some of them had tried to protect themselves as best they could, for their personal weapons were usually near them, but the monster had gotten to them anyway. Women, children, families, it didn't matter. It was merciless. His mind flashed back to his rampage at ShinRa years ago. He saw Cissnei die right in front of him again, just like it happened in his nightmares. He quickly shook the memory away; this wasn't the time to break down.

It was then that he heard a low inhuman growl coming from behind. He quickly spun around to face the monster that was a mere two yards away, crouched down and ready to pounce. Once he laid his eyes on it his heart skipped a beat , and fear surfaced once more.

_No way, it can't be!_

There were differences, like the bright red glowing eyes and sharp canine like fangs, but the claws and black wing were the same. There was no doubt about it; this was another one of Hojo's successful experiments. He noticed it still appeared to be somewhat human, but no one would've guessed with it almost completely splattered in the blood of its victims, and the absolute rage and urge to kill in its eyes. He couldn't help wondering if this was how he looked to everyone when he snapped and killed.

Zack was so lost in his thoughts that he barely noticed when the creature sprang at him. He snapped out of it at the last second and dug his heels into the ground so it couldn't knock him back. He held the creature an arm's length away, but it kept on trying to push past his strength and claw at him. He knew that he couldn't keep it from doing so forever, and that he needed to end it quick if he wanted to come out of the fight unscathed. With one swift motion he grabbed a hold of the creature just for a moment, then kicked it right in the jaw before letting go.

There was a sickening crunch bones shattering on impact, then an animalistic screech as it was knocked to the ground. . Zack then sprang upon it, and pinned it down roughly as it tried to get up once more. It struggled beneath him as it tried to get free, but even with its massive strength it was no match for the Ex-SOLDIER.

The monster inside him wanted to make his death slow and painful as punishment for slaughtering so many people, but he reminded himself that it had once been a normal human just like he had, and probably had no control of his actions right now. He frowned down at it, wondering if he could help him at all, try and snap him out of it like Cissnei had been able to do with him. Then he remembered that the only reason it had worked with him was because he heard a friend call his name, but he didn't know this person much less his name.

Seeing the anger and rage in his eyes made Zack's heart ache, and he knew that there wasn't much else he could do besides giving him a quick and painless death. He wasn't really religious, but he said a silent prayer to the Goddess, hoping that it would at least be able to rest in the lifestream peacefully. He snapped its neck quickly, cringing at the sound, but relieved it was done. The struggling and noise stopped instantly, and the light faded from its eyes.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

He closed its eyes gently, then rolled the corpse over and lifted the hair off it's neck so he could take a look. It was just as he feared, _P: SM-S 005 _was tattooed on the back of it; they were indeed part of the same project. He sighed, and felt the back of his own neck, knowing that Hojo tattooed _P: SM-S 001 _back there as well. It would always be a permanent reminder of what he was.

"So Hojo got around to making more, that's just great," he said sarcastically.

He got out his phone to call Tseng and tell him what happened, only to find out that he had no reception. However once he was up in the air he was able to make the call and explain everything that happened. Then he killed time by searching the town for any survivors while he waited for them to arrive.

* * *

><p>"Damn it!" he said as he punched a wall in frustration.<p>

It was the last house that he was checking for anyone who might be alive, but all they found was another family of bloody corpses. It truly was Nibelheim all over again. They both heard the sound of helicopters approaching the village, so he went outside to see three of them landing, and the WRO troops began to put all the corpses into body bags so they could be identified and handed over to any family they had.

"Any survivors?" Tseng asked him as he walked over to him calmly.

Zack lowered his eyes and shook his head, then looked Tseng in the eyes seriously.

"This isn't going to be covered up like Nibelheim, is it?"

"No," Tseng told him, making Zack relax slightly. "ShinRa has truly changed their policy, and the public needs to know about this."

Zack nodded firmly, glad that the matter had been settled.

"I would like to see this specimen."

Zack nodded again, and silently led him to its corpse. Tseng bent down to examine it closely. Zack kept his distance as he did so, not wanting to look at it for another second. Just the thought of knowing that others had suffered the experiments as he did sent a mix of confusing emotions through out him.

"Project SOLDIER Monster," Zack began, keeping his eyes downcast. "He's the fifth specimen, which means that there's likely to be at least three more somewhere out there."

Not good news Zack to tell, especially since there was no way to tell how many Hojo had succeeded with, but it needed to be known.

"He was in SOLDIER."

"What?" Zack asked as he lifted his gaze confusedly.

He leaned over to get a better look. Tseng had gently opened one of the specimen's eyelids to reveal Mako infused eyes with only a vague tint of red left. His heart skipped a beat as fear set in. Fear that he could've killed one of his old comrades without recognizing him. Fear that the others were people that he knew. He quickly looked away, not wanting to look at him any longer.

"I'll have some DNA samples tested so we can find out who he is," Tseng assured him as he stood up.

"I just don't understand why this is happening now. Hojo's dead," he said.

"You're absolutely sure of that?" Tseng asked him.

"Of course I am!" Zack shouted at him in frustration, momentarily attracting the attention of the soldiers around them. He glanced around and noticed this, then took a deep breath to calm down. After a few moments, the soldiers went back to their business.

"He probably was working with others then, maybe a new terrorist organization."

"Still doesn't make much sense if you ask me," Zack muttered.

So far there wasn't a slightest clue of who the monsters were created for or why their purpose was, but as far as he could tell the resulted experiments were to create mad killing machines that never stopped. What was the point in that? He had never got that with Deep Ground, either.

"I'll let you know as soon as we find something more. You're free to go unless you want to help here."

"No, thanks," Zack declined politely.

He wanted to get away from this as fast as possible. He needed to get home to think in peace and quiet, and see how Kunsel was doing in the hospital.

* * *

><p>As Tseng promised, the news completely covered the Corel massacre. The people were warned of the monsters, and were also told that both WRO and ShinRa troops would be patrolling around every major town and city until the rest of them were found and dealt with. Zack turned his television off after that. He didn't want to hear any more.<p>

Tseng had called him a while ago, and not with good news. The DNA samples had confirmed that it was Luxiere; he had killed another one of his friends. It was then when he began to hate himself once more, and isolated himself in his room. He sat there silently on his bed gazing at his hands. The hands that had so easily killed Cissnei and Luxiere.

_I really am a monster..._

He glanced down at the scars on his arm and thought about trying to end his life once more, but quickly pushed that thought out of his mind for good. He still hadn't found his reason for living, but that didn't mean that it wasn't out there. Plus he had to help with this current crisis and find out who was behind it all.

He sighed as he laid back and wondered what exactly he had done to deserve this. Every time things seemed to calm down and lighten up again, something always came crashing down right on top of him like this. He wasn't sure if he could take much more.

"Just gotta keep moving forward," he muttered to himself.

He let out another deep sigh and closed his eyes so he could try and get some sleep. As soon as he was starting to drift off his phone rang. He groaned in annoyance as he rolled over and grabbed it off the night stand, and squinted at the screen to make out Kunsel's number on the caller ID.

"Hi Kunsel," he said a bit groggily.

"Oh, did I wake you up? Sorry..."

"It's fine, I wasn't even asleep yet."

"Yeah, ok." There was a pause, and he could make out some background noise from the beeps of the heart monitors and doctors being paged.

"You ok?" Zack asked him.

"I think I should be asking you that. Tseng told me what happened."

"Oh..."

"Zack, listen to me, ok? There wasn't anything you could've done for him."

"You don't know that Kunsel."

"You tried, didn't you?"

"Yeah, but-"

"Zack."

"But I-"

"Zack!"

_But I should've recognized him...I should've done something more to help him._

It was very reasonable that he didn't recognize him though. He hadn't known Luxiere all that well, and had rarely seen him without his SOLDIER helmet off. He could've easily forgotten his face, but even knowing that he still kept blaming himself.

"You can't keep beating yourself up over things like this, Zack."

"I know..." he said quietly.

"You sure you're gonna be alright now?"

"Yeah. This won't push me over the edge again, I promise."

"Good. I'll probably be out in a day or two. I'll come by and check on you ,alright?"

"Yeah."

"Alright, I'll talk to you later then."

"Bye."

He hung up and checked the time. Almost midnight; maybe he had fallen asleep for a while after all and hadn't known it. Either way, he didn't feel tired enough to try and rest now. He figured he would go out for a nice walk to get things off his mind. At this time of night he could go where he felt the most calm without taking the chance of anyone being there: Aerith's church in Midgar.

* * *

><p>It had been a long hard day of work for Cloud, and he was finally starting to wind down and take it easy. He had just finished doing the dishes and was just about to head upstairs for a nice shower and some sleep when he heard the soft tapping of Aerith's come down.<p>

Elmyra had, unfortunately, been one of the victims of Geostigma that hadn't made it before Aerith had been able to summon her healing rain. After her death Cloud and Tifa had invited Aerith to come live with them. She had accepted with joy, glad to live with close friends rather than being alone.

"Something wrong?" he asked.

"I know it's late, but it looks like there's gonna be a big storm coming in soon and I'm worried about the flowers."

He saw her point. She cared deeply about those flowers, and since there was hardly any roof left in the place and rain got in often she kept a tarp over at the church to cover them whenever she thought it was going to rain pretty hard.

"I can take you," he told her.

He didn't really see any problem with it. It was only a few minutes away by motorcycle, and the kids were already asleep in their beds.

"Thanks, Cloud," she said with a smile.

He grabbed his keys as she went and got her shoes on, then waited for her outside by Fenrir. He thought about saying goodbye to Tifa, but she was downstairs running the bar and he figured she'd be pretty busy with her costumers.

"You forgot something, Cloud," Aerith said as she came outside with his helmet.

He groaned when he saw it, but still put it on. He hated it since it was really tight and messed up his hair, but Aerith and Tifa had gotten it for safety reasons. They were always telling him that one of these days he was going to get hurt if he didn't wear one. And while he promised that he was always extremely careful, he now knew that they were right. It was mainly because he had gotten clobbered two days ago, and that was proof enough that anything could happen.

They drove to Midgar without any major problems. They saw the patrol outside of Edge, but Cloud just drove right past them, not wanting to be stopped . One of the soldiers yelled at him as he went by, but didn't try and stop him.

"It'll just be a minute" Aerith assured him as she hopped off Fenrir when they stopped in front of the dilapidated church.

"Wait." He drew one of his swords and went ahead of her. A few monsters lurked in the Midgar ruins, and a time or two they had gotten an unfriendly surprise when they went inside. It was better to be safe than sorry, especially since he had seen the news.

He opened the door quietly and kept a tight grip on his sword. Nothing jumped out at him, so he scanned all the dark corners with his eyes. As far as he could tell it was empty, but he stepped inside for a closer look to be sure.

"All clear!" he shouted as he sheathed his sword.

She then came in and with his help put the tarp over her flower bed and the pool of water that still remained from the time that she summoned the lifestream water to help Cloud and cure his Geostigma. Then they tied it down so it wouldn't be blown away, and headed back towards Fenrir.

It was then that he became uneasy. Some would call it SOLDIER instincts, but since he never got into SOLDIER he didn't refer to it as that. Aerith noticed that he suddenly tensed up and grabbed a hold of his sword, and was about to ask what was wrong when they both heard a low growl come from the shadows.

"Get back inside, I'll take care of this," Cloud told her.

She nodded, and quickly ran back inside the church and began silently praying that he would be alright.

Outside Cloud barely had enough time to draw his sword before the monster leapt at him. He was able to block the first blow easily, and even knock it back a bit, but he knew that the monster would most likely come at him again in moments He decided to first get it away from the church, just to be sure that Aerith wouldn't get hurt.

When the creature sprang at him once more he continued to knock it back with hard blows from his sword, until it retreated into the shadows. Cloud stiffened, knowing that he was now vulnerable from anywhere now. He scanned the area slowly as he took slow steps away from the church, keeping his eyes peeled for any sudden movement in the darkness.

Unfortunately he failed to notice that behind him the monster was scaling the church wall with his claws, until it jumped down at him for a fatal blow at his neck. Cloud noticed at the last moment, and was able to spin around and block the blow with his sword.

He mentally cursed when he got a minor cut on his arm, wishing he had grabbed some materia before he left so he could heal it up. He quickly looked around for other options for a quick and easy kill, and spotted the remains of a brick house in front of them. With all his strength he gave a good hard shove at the monster, forcing him to collide hard with the wall.

There was a sickening crunch as the skull was cracked, followed by dark blood staining the wall and pooling around it as the monster finally collapsed dead. Cloud poked at it with his sword, then sat down, absolutely exhausted, when he was sure it was dead.

He would just rest for a moment, and then go home safely with Aerith.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, Zack had his own hands full with yet another one of the monsters. He had been on his way to the church as he had planned, but on the way he caught a glimpse of it heading towards Edge, and jumped into action before it spotted him. However this one seemed both stronger and even a bit more strategic than the last one, and was giving him some serious trouble.<p>

Zack tried to pin him down like he had done with the last monster, but as soon as he had him down on the ground the monster swiped his claws across Zack's chest. It didn't create a deep wound, but it was enough to make him bleed and cry out. Here is where you should probably say something about Zack getting knocked backwards and off the monster. He quickly got up, anger now adding to his determination to defeat the monster.

He saw it start to climb the church, so he quickly ran and leapt at it, tackling it into the wall. It gave away from the sudden extra weight, sending them both sprawling onto the church floor as it fell. Zack glanced up when he heard a scream, immediately recognizing it as Aerith's.

Fear settled in quickly. What was she doing here at this time of night? Did she see him? Did she now know what he was? He glanced up as the fear began to course through him, and saw her unconscious on the floor. She had been knocked back by them, and had hit her head. Rage quickly took the place of his fear, and he glared down at the monster pinned beneath him, suddenly wanting to tear it apart for hurting Aerith.

* * *

><p>Cloud bolted right up when he heard Aerith scream. He tried not to panic, but his mind flashed back to when Sephiroth almost killed her. If he had gotten there a moment later, then she would be long dead now. Back then he had pushed her out of the way just in time. Ever since he had been paranoid that something like that would happen to her or someone close to him again, and he wouldn't be there to save them.<p>

He got back to the church in seconds thanks to the sudden adrenaline rush, and began looking around for her, as well as any danger. His eyes landed on a monster seemingly exactly like the one he had just killed, but this one had been torn to shreds. He looked away quickly, not wanting to think about what other monster could've killed it and possibly done the same to Aerith.

"Aerith?" he called, his heart pounding with growing worry.

She was no where in sight.

_**Author's Notes**_

Thank you for being patient with me, it took a lot longer than expected. This is officially the longest chapter I've ever written so far. The next chapter is already done and shouldn't take to long to edit, so I should be able to update on time for once. I sense some Zerith coming up…


	6. VI Sleep

_**VI Sleep**_

Zack sighed as he gently set Aerith down on his couch. His mind was whirling once again, the constant stream of thoughts and emotions nearly unbearable. He knew it was extremely stupid for him to bring her home like this, especially considering that she could wake up at any moment and see him, but he hadn't been able to leave her there like that. He hadn't seen Fenrir outside, so he had no idea that Cloud had been nearby at all.

He had called Tseng on his way home, once again gave a short explanation to what happened, and asked him to come by and take Aerith home safely. He would be here any moment now, and Zack would still remain dead to her.

However, another part of him wanted her to wake up before he came. He wanted her to let her know that he was alive after all, that he still missed her dearly and wanted to be with her. But he was still afraid. Afraid of rejection, afraid that she would want to stay as far away from him as possible after finding out what he was. He didn't want to take that chance, for he would be forever heart broken if it did turn out like that.

"You're so beautiful," he said softly as he gently stroked her face with a gloved hand.

He smiled as he took in her face again, glad that the only change over the years was the fact that she seemed to have grown even more beautiful. She even still wore that pink ribbon that he had gotten her long ago, and he could tell from the faded color and beginnings of tears and holes that she was planning to wear it to shreds.

"You still miss me, don't you?" he asked her, heart heavy with guilt for being selfish like this.

His heart begged him to take that chance, telling him that she would accept him for who he was on the inside, and not care about the rest, but he wouldn't listen. He could admit that it could be like that, but he wasn't willing to take the risk.

He winced from the sudden pain from his injuries, and realized he should take care of them while he was waiting for Tseng. They weren't deep, and the bleeding had stopped so there wasn't any need to go to the energy room or hospital. He would just swab some rubbing alcohol on to prevent infection, and heal it up with his cure materia. Problem gone.

"Sleep well, my angel."

She stirred a bit when he kissed her softly on the cheek, but didn't wake. Seeing that things would be fine he headed toward the bathroom to take care of his wounds.

Aerith opened her eyes moments later. She looked around as she sat up slowly, trying to figure out where she was. The last thing she remembered was hiding in the church from the monster that Cloud was fighting when two more suddenly came crashing through the wall. Everything after that was blank, but the back of her head hurt, so she guessed that she'd been injured somehow.

"Hello?" she called as she got up and began walking around the apartment. "Cloud?"

Where was he? Did he bring her here? And where was 'here' anyway? Nothing looked familiar inside, so she peaked out the nearest window and was relieved to see that she was back in Edge. She decided to look around some more, and see if whoever brought her here was home.

Noting that the bedroom door was open, she poked her head in with caution and gasped at what she saw. A large cork board covered one of the walls, and on it were each and every one of her letters that she wrote to Zack. At first she didn't believe her eyes, and thought for sure it was all a dream, but as she looked closely at the hand writing and felt the texture of the paper she knew that is was all real.

"Zack..."

A single tear fell from her eye. He was here, he was alive.

He was hiding in the bathroom, trying not to panic. He had just finished healing his wound with his cure materia when he had heard her get up and moved around. He closed the bathroom door slowly and as quietly as possible, glad that it didn't squeak.

He sighed from relief, and felt like hitting his head on the wall. God, he felt so pathetic. Here he was, hiding in the bathroom from the woman he loved. Never did he picture himself doing something like this. He had three options, and he didn't really like any of them. He could wait until Tseng arrived, then Aerith wouldn't notice him at all, but he had heard her go into his room, and knew that she had by now spotted the letters on the wall. He knew there was no way she was leaving without answers.

He could knock her out again, but there was no way he was hurting her. That left him with the only option left: to take the chance and let her see him. He sighed as he grabbed a fresh shirt from the laundry, then slid it on and tucked his wing inside it in the process. Never in his life had be been so nervous before.

He made sure that he gloves were on as well, then slowly opened the door. He saw Aerith in his room with her back to him, so he slowly stepped in. Out of the corner of his eye he saw his Sleep materia on the end table, and realized that he could use it on her without harming her in any way, and get himself out of this situation. It was cowardly, and he knew there wasn't any honor in running away, but it would work. He quietly snatched it up, but before he could go any further Aerith spun around and saw him.

"Zack..."

Tears fell from her eyes, but he knew they were tears of joy.

"It is really you, isn't it?" she asked as she approached him cautiously.

"Yeah..."

She reached out to touch him, to make sure that he was indeed real, then embraced him tightly as more tears slid down her face.

"I missed you so much..."

"I know," he whispered to her, hesitating to hug her back.

He missed her greatly too. The warm soft feeling of her close to him, the sweet scent of her skin and hair, he had almost forgotten what that had been like. For that moment, he forgot what he was. He felt completely human again, and wanted that moment to last forever. When he was brought back to the cold hard world of reality, he pulled away.

"Zack?"

"I'm sorry," he apologized softly, keeping his eyes downcast and away from her. He wanted to be with her more than anything, but his fear prevented that.

"Zack, please, tell me what's wrong," she pleaded.

She reached out to him once more, but he stepped away. Her face fell, and her heart ached as he purposely tried to get away from her. He had never done that before, she had never seen him like this.

"I'm sorry," he apologized again, turning away from her completely. "I just, I can't-"

_Be with you anymore._

He couldn't bring himself to say it, for he knew that those words would crush both of them.

"Zack..."

She gently placed her hand on his shoulder. Something was definitely wrong, why else would he pretend to be dead all these years?

"You can tell me anything, Zack," she assured him.

He still wouldn't look at her.

"I...I'm not-"

_Human anymore._

He was to afraid to let it all come out. It would end things between them permanently, and he wouldn't be able to hide it for long if the stayed close. He had to stay dead. He felt the materia in his hand, and knew that it was the only way to keep things the way they were.

"Please forgive me, Aerith," he said as he cast it on her, and caught her now sleeping form in his arms.

When she woke up, she would be safe at home, and the rest of it would be a dream.

_**Author's Notes**_

Yeah I bet you guys hate me for messing with you like this. However it's pretty obvious that Zack isn't gonna be able to stay "dead" to Cloud and Aerith for much longer. In fact, I've actually changed the plans slightly to make it a chapter sooner. Also, would the reviewer **Bananas in Pajamas **please make an account or log in so I can answer you're questions? Due to my procrastination, I have only barely started the next chapter, so it's probably gonna take a couple weeks.


	7. VII Confusion

_**VII Confusion**_

When Aerith woke up in the morning she was very confused. Surely it couldn't have all been a dream, could it? She shook her head. No, she had actually felt Zack there. But something hadn't been right, she had never seen Zack like that.

_Why are you hiding from us__,__ Zack?_

She sighed as got undressed and stepped in the shower, and decided to ask Cloud later. She had obviously gotten home somehow, and if Cloud had seen Zack she knew he wouldn't let him get away without answers.

She made her shower a quick one, then put on some fresh clothes and braided her hair as she walked down the stairs. She smiled as she saw Cloud finishing up his breakfast, glad that he hadn't left on his deliveries yet.

"You're up," he said as he glanced up at her.

"Yeah," she said calmly before fixing herself some cereal and taking a seat next to him at the table. "How did I get home?" she asked.

"Tseng showed up last night carrying you," he told her.

* * *

><p><em>Cloud looked everywhere for <em>_any__ sign of what happened to Aerith, but found none. He thought that maybe she had ran off when she saw the monster, so he waited by Fenrir for a while in case she came back. When she didn't, he decided to go back home and wait for her there._

_Only moments after he had gotten inside and taken his shoes off there was a knock at the door. He didn't waste a second opening it__,__ hoping it was Aerith. He was disappointed when he saw that it was Tseng, and wondered what he would be doing at his door in the middle of the night, but then saw Aerith sleeping in his arms._

"_Is she hurt?" he __immediately asked as he gently took her from his arms._

"_No__,__" Tseng answered calmly._

"_Where'd you find her?" Cloud asked __with suspicious eyes__, knowing that he was hiding something._

"_That's classified__.__"_

_Cloud's eyes narrowed at him. He set Aerith down on the couch beside him, then turned back to Tseng. _

"_These new monsters; what are they?"_

"_We don't know everything yet, but I can tell you that you might be in danger__.__"_

"_How so?" he asked__,__ now all ears._

"_These monsters that are popping up are experiments. From the data we've gathered so f__ar, all of them have been identified as missing SOLDIER members, others were thought to be dead."_

"_You're forgetting that I wasn't in SOLDIER__,__" Cloud pointed out._

"_You're still built like one, and whoever is pulling the strings may decide to come after you next__.__"_

"Then he left, and I took you upstairs," Cloud told her.

"I see..."

Aerith was more than a little disappointed, he could see it on her face as well as hear it in her tone of voice. She was also worried, could Cloud be in danger too? She knew that he was more than capable of protecting himself and handling enemies, but anything could happen.

"Do you remember what happened last night?" he asked.

"Sort of," she admitted. "I remember going to the church with you, but then… things get a little fuzzy after that…" She gently rubbed the back of her head where it had gotten hit. It would explain the small black out, she just hoped that it didn't cause hallucinations either.

"I did wake up for a bit afterwards, in an apartment I think."

"Who's?"

She bit her lip. Would Cloud believe her? He was convinced that Zack was long dead, but she, on the other hand, had never really been convinced so. She remembered the day he had been shot down; she had felt his pain. Later on Tseng had told her that he had been killed in action, but even then she hadn't believed it. She thought for sure that he had been lying then, and went into a period of denial afterwards.

Then of course there was the dream she had the night she had been captured and taken to ShinRa...

_She was back in the church tending to the flowers quietly. Her dream self heard the door open quietly, so she turned around and saw Zack standing the door way. Her heart leapt for joy as she saw him again, and she smiled. She wanted to run to him and hug him tightly, but her feet wouldn't budge._

_It was then when she noticed the pained expression on his face__, and the tears in his eyes. Something was wrong._

"_Zack?" she asked, urging her feet to move towards him, but still failing to do so._

"_I'm sorry__,__" he whispered, tears falling down his cheeks __"I never should have left__,__" he was starting to choke on his words now, and her heart skipped a beat as she saw him turn to leave._

"_Zack wait!" she pleaded, hating that she was still stuck in one place._

"_I love you__,__" he __said softly._

_She was taken back by those words, and felt tears coming into her own eyes hearing them. He had never said those words to her, but she always wanted him to. She now knew that this wasn't real, and it hurt her to see him leaving her even in a dream._

"_Please don't leave me, don't leave me alone like this...__.__"_

_But he did, and she never dreamed of him since._

For a while she thought that one dream had meant something, and pondered about it. Then, as time passed and things got more hectic, she forgot about it entirely. She hadn't remembered it until now. Surely that meant it actually did mean something, right?

She took a deep breath, and decided to tell him.

"Zack's. I saw him last night, I'm sure of it."

Cloud was at a loss for words. He opened his mouth, and then closed it as if he couldn't get the words out. Then he stood up, and calmly took his dirty dishes to the kitchen sink.

"Zack died almost five years ago Aerith, you know that."

"But I'm telling you that I-"

"Aerith!" he snapped. "Please, I don't want to talk about this..."

She understood and kept quiet. He had gotten over his depression period a while ago, that much was sure, but she had a feeling that deep down he still blamed himself for Zack's apparent death.

"Alright," she whispered.

She didn't want to tear open the wounds that Cloud had healed; she would just have to get to the bottom of it all on her own.

"I've got deliveries to make," he said.

She nodded, and after she heard him drive away on Fenrir she decided to head out as well. Some fresh air would help her think, and if possible she wanted to track down Tseng and see what she could do. It was clear that Zack was indeed alive and hiding something, and Tseng knew about it.

* * *

><p>Kunsel stood outside Zack's apartment door, tapping one of the crutches helping to support his broken leg against the ground with growing impatience and worry. There were also a few stitches or bandages here and there, but other than that he was alright.<p>

He had been discharged from the hospital about an hour ago, and called Zack to let him know that he was stopping by with lunch, but he never answered. It could be that he was out and his phone was left behind, off, or dead, but he couldn't help wondering if Luxiere's death had indeed pushed him over the edge again. He tapped his fingers impatiently after he knocked again, then sighed. He kicked over the doormat with his foot, then bent down to pick up Zack's spare key.

"Zack?" he called once he got inside. "You home?"

It was quiet, which meant that he either was indeed be out somewhere, or was dying in one of these very rooms. The bathroom door was open, and when he looked he was relieved to find it empty. He set down the bag of take out on the kitchen table and was about to sit and wait for him to get back when he noticed the bedroom door was also open.

"Zack?" he called again.

He decided to poke his head in, and saw his friend facing Aerith's letters on the wall.

"I'm an idiot Kunsel, an idiot and a coward," Zack said quietly without turning to face him.

Kunsel frowned, and took a seat on Zack's bed.

"You want to talk about it?"

Zack sighed, then stared down at the floor.

"I had her in right in my arms, but I panicked and pushed her away."

"Whoa, hang on. Start from the beginning."

So he did. He told Kunsel about heading to the church, then fighting the monster and getting Aerith right in the middle of it all.

"After I cast sleep on her, Tseng showed up and took her home."

"But why didn't you just tell her everything, Zack? I'm sure she would still love you for who you are on the inside."

"Kunsel, my parents don't even know about the experiments. You know simply because I couldn't get around it."

"And I accepted it, didn't I? I didn't cast you off as a freak or try and kill you. You can't hide forever, Zack."

"I know that, but… I'm just…" He sighed. "I'm not ready, not yet."

"When you are it might be too late," he pointed out. "She's in love with you now, but someone else may come along at any time."

It hurt him to hear that, but he knew that Kunsel was right. If he really did stay dead to her, then come out to her with the truth later, it might be too late. He sighed, and looked down at his hands. Even if they did end up together, the chance that he could snap and hurt her terrified him. He remembered the state of rage he had been in when he saw that she had gotten hurt, and how he had tore the creature to shreds until it wasn't recognizable because of it. He shivered just thinking about it. He never wanted something like that to happen ever again, even if he quickly came back to reality like before.

"I'm just not sure if it's meant to be anymore..."

He heard Kunsel sigh, and looked up at him to see him shaking his head.

"Try and look at it this way, you love her right?"

"Yeah…"

"And she loves you back?"

"As far as I can tell."

"Then there's nothing to get yourself worked up about, love is a powerful thing. Now quit moping around like this, I brought food."

"I'm not hungry," he muttered as he curled up on his bed and rolled over so he was facing away from him. But his stomach betrayed him and growled loudly, making Kunsel smile.

"Oh, really?"

He groaned as he stood up and headed towards the kitchen, admitting defeat. He was not the master of his stomach.

* * *

><p>"Sorry miss, but it's too dangerous."<p>

Aerith sighed as she gave up. She was heading towards Midgar so she could remove the tarp off her flowers and pick some to sell, but the ShinRa troops paroling the outskirts of Edge wouldn't let her pass. She was about to give up and go back home, when a voice from behind spoke.

"It's alright, I'll go with her."

She recognized it immediately, and spun around to see that it was indeed Tseng. She couldn't believe her luck, now she didn't have to try and track him down.

"Yes, sir," the troop said with a salute before letting them both go on ahead.

The two started walking towards Midgar in silence, and Aerith decided to take her approach calmly.

"Thank you for taking me home last night," she said.

She saw him tense up a bit, but he still replied in his usual calm tone. "You're welcome."

Silence came again and continued for most of the way until Aerith had enough. She stepped in front of him suddenly and looked him in the eyes, making him raise an eyebrow.

"Tseng, please," she began. "At least tell me why he's hiding from us."

"I don't know what you're talking about, Aerith," he lied with ease.

He tried to get around her, but she saw his movements and side stepped in front of him once more.

"I know Zack's alive, Tseng!" she yelled at him. "Please, I need answers!"

"It's not for me to tell Aerith, it's his choice."

It hurt her to hear him say that, and she felt tears in her eyes.

"But why? Why did Zack choose to hide from us, to be dead to us?"

She fought against the tears that were forming in her eyes. When she felt the first one fall, she quickly turned away. She was not going to cry in front of Tseng like a child.

* * *

><p>It didn't take long for Cloud to finish his in town deliveries. He had one in Kalm later that day, and had time to spare. He thought about going home and spending some time with Tifa and the kids, but what Aerith had said to him that morning was still in his mind. Instead he decided to pay a visit to Zack's grave.<p>

So he drove outside the city and into the barren wasteland that surrounded it. Minutes later he was on the cliff that looked over Edge and Midgar, the cliff that Zack had died on. He had left his old Buster Sword in the ground, and came out once in a while to clean it so it wouldn't rust. Aerith had also planted some of her flowers around it, and they had surprisingly grown very well.

He sighed as he placed his hand on it, and felt a raindrop fall on him moments later. He glanced up at the gray clouded sky, and saw the rain start to come down on the world. It reminded him of the day that Zack had died...

_Everything was tinted green from the mako, and his body ached from it greatly. He blinked a few times trying to get his eyes to focus, then looked around him. He was on the muddy ground that felt like one big suction cup around him__,__ preventing him from going anywhere. He tried to stand up, using the rocks behind him as support, only to fail and fall._

_He groaned as he pushed himself up out of the mud, then saw Zack lying on the ground only a few feet away. He now knew that he was to__o__ weak to stand and walk, so he began inching towards him on his hands in knees. He was much weaker than expected, and every movement made the aching pain worse._

_Finally he was beside his friend, and was horrified to see that he was covered in blood, and his SOLDIER shirt was full of bullet holes._

"_Z-Zack__...__" he whispered__._

_Zack flinched from the pain as he took a labored breath, then lifted his head and looked at Cloud before speaking._

"_For the...both of us__…"_

"_Both...of us?" Cloud __asked, not having a clue of what was going on or what he was talking about._

"_That's right..."Zack said. "You're gonna..."_

_He drifted off, and quietly gasped for air as his breathing became more labored._

"_You're gonna...__?" Cloud repeated._

_He saw Zack slowly lift his arm, then felt it gently clutching the back of his head moments later._

"_Live..." Zack finished as his he gently pulled down Cloud onto his chest._

_He could only vaguely hear the sound of Zack's heart beat, but his rough breathing was clear. He wondered why he seemed so warm when the rain was so cold, but then realized that what he felt against his skin was blood. Zack was dying._

_No. He thought. No, no, no no no!_

_It was absolutely terrifying. Zack couldn't die, he couldn't lose his friend like this. Zack was the only people that had actually cared about him and didn't call him weak. He had saved his life, and now he was dying because of it._

"_You'll be...my living legacy" Zack said softly._

_Zack's arm fell from him moments later, and Cloud sat up still feeling the blood on his face. He didn't want to be his living legacy, how could he? He wasn't strong like he was, and Zack had gotten hurt all because of him. But it was Zack's dying wish, he couldn't refuse it._

_He looked down at his friend, and Zack smiled. Then he glanced over at his Buster sword next to him, and tightened his grip on it before slowly lifting it up to Cloud._

"_My honor, my dreams...they're yours now__.__" Zack told him._

_Cloud hesitated for a moment before reaching out to the sword, then gripped the handle tightly. Zack smiled at him, then let go and briefly touched his hand before dropping his arm entirely._

"_I'm your...living legacy__,__" Cloud repeated softly._

_Zack smiled at him once more, then slowly began to close his eyes. Cloud felt tears coming to his eyes, realizing that Zack would never open them again. Then he was startled by the sound of a ShinRa helicopter nearby. He gasped as he began to panic. ShinRa was still after them. They had finished off Zack, and now we're coming after him, and there was no way he would be able to fight back._

"_Run__,__" Zack said between labored breaths, trying his best to hang on just for a little longer._

_Cloud took one glance where the noise was coming from, then turned back to his friend. He didn't want to leave him, but he knew if he stayed then he would be shot down as well, and Zack would die in vain._

"_Go!" Zack commanded, trying to shout, but barely making __his voice __a loud whisper._

_Cloud nodded firmly as he stood up, using the sword to support him. Adrenaline was running through him now, making him strong enough to walk away. He couldn't run, and eventually he tripped and fell. At the last moment he dropped the sword and put his hands in front of him so he wouldn't fall flat. It was then when he decided to look back for a moment, just to see how far he had gotten._

_He was surprised that he had only made it a few yards, and paled when he saw some ShinRa infantrymen talking around Zack's corpse. He couldn't make out anything what they were saying, but he didn't care, getting away was top priority. He didn't know know how much further he could get in his weak condition, and knew that if he fell again one of them could take notice. Instead he grabbed the buster sword, and quickly crawled behind the nearest__ formation of__ large rocks. Hiding would have to do._

_He decided to peak around and look again, this time to make sure that they weren't coming close to him. He stiffened when he saw them pick up Zack's corpse and take it away, then clenched his fist in anger. ShinRa just wouldn't leave him alone. First they killed him, then they had to dispose of the body. Zack didn't deserve that, not one bit._

_The rain continued to pour down on him, and he continued to hide even after they had all left. He clenched the buster sword tightly, remembering every word what Zack had told him. Tears formed in his eyes, and when it was obvious that he couldn't hold them back he threw his head back and let out an agonizing scream._

Cloud sighed as he took his hand off of the sword, and pondered about what Aerith had had. He had seen Zack die, that much he was sure of, but how good was his memory? His Mako poisoning had corrupted it before, and even now it was fuzzy in places. What if Aerith was right, what if Zack really was alive and well? He remembered seeing his corpse being dragged away, but maybe they didn't dispose of him like he thought.

Still the whole thing was confusing, didn't make much sense, and standing out in the middle of a downpour wasn't helping him think. He flipped open his phone to check the time. Seeing that he had plenty he decided to go home, dry off, and talk to Aerith about it all.

* * *

><p>Zack sighed when the rain finally stopped, glad that he wouldn't get drenched, but he still wished that the sun would come out from behind the gray thick clouds. The WRO was short on members for the Kalm patrol, so Zack told Reeve that he would help out for the day. Now here he was dressed in standard WRO soldier uniform, and armed with a 9mm hand gun. While he had no problem with using his claws, he didn't want other people to see them and freak out.<p>

He was making his rounds on the main street, when he saw Cloud park Fenrir across the street. Habit made him duck into the nearest alleyway, but when he was about to go through to be safe and avoid him, Kunsel's words rang out in his mind:

"_You can't hide forever__,__ Zack__.__"_

He bit his lip as he turned around and glanced at Cloud from afar. Kunsel was right, and if Angeal was still around he knew that he would agree. Running away and hiding wasn't honorable at all, it was the actions of a coward. He sighed as he made up his mind. He was going to take that chance now, no more hiding from his friends. He just hoped that Cloud wouldn't completely flip.

He came out of the shadows, and calmly walked across the street where Cloud was just getting off of Fenrir. He was glad there weren't many people around, since if Cloud freaked out he wouldn't cause a scene.

"Cloud," he said, catching his friend's attention.

Cloud went white when he saw him, then backed up against the nearest wall.

"Z-Zack?" he asked in shock.

"It's me," he assured him. "I'm not dead."

The color returned to Cloud's face as he calmed down a bit, then he reached out and touched him just to make sure he was real. _Aerith was right..._ He thought.

"How do I know it's really you?" he asked, eyes narrowing as he hand slowly reached for his sword. "This could be some kind of trick."

"I hear you," Zack said as he tried to think of something to prove that he was indeed the real Zack Fair. It had to be something that only him and Cloud knew, but what? Then he remembered something that would both work, and embarrass Cloud at the same time. He smirked and chuckled, making Cloud raise an eyebrow at him.

"When I got us out of Nibelheim I went through your pockets and found a pair of womens panties," Zack told him.

Cloud blushed at the memory, remembering that while he'd had some free time on that mission he had gone into Tifa's house, and indeed taken a pair of her undergarments. To think that Zack knew that...

"I bet they were Tifa's," Zack added as he continued to smirk at him.

"Alright, I get it," Cloud said as his embarrassment increased, adding to the blush. Then his tone turned serious.

"Why have you been hiding from us all this time?" he asked, wondering what had happened to make it so.

Zack's smile quickly faded, and he scratched the back of his neck nervously as he lowered his gaze.

"It's complicated..."

Both of them glanced up at the sound of sudden gunfire a few blocks away, and didn't waste another second before running towards it. Cloud drew his sword, and Zack reached for his gun. There were two men down: One was on the ground, already dead, while the other appeared to just be unconscious. The gunfire came from the third soldier, one that was mildly wounded in the shoulder, but still shooting at the monsters until his ammo ran out.

Zack jumped into action as the specimen lept at them, quickly emptying the magazine of his gun as bullets flew towards the monster. It stumbled back, making it shriek as it fell to the ground. It twitched a few times, but by then more from the patrol had shown up and finished it off. Both he and Cloud sighed from relief that it was over, but realized that it wasn't when they heard a low growl come from the shadows.

Zack saw it first, and leapt at it before it could make the first strike. Cloud caught on, and tossed one of his swords at Zack seeing that he didn't have a weapon. Zack smiled as he caught it and gripped it tightly, oh how it felt good to hold one again.

"Thanks!" Zack shouted at him without looking back.

The monster saw Zack coming at him, and thought best to retreat. It scampered up the brick wall to get away from him, but Zack easily leapt over it and kept chase. Seeing that he had followed it into a deep dark alley where there were plenty of shadows it could hide in, he swung at it with all his might.

It let out a short whimper before it crashed into the opposite wall, then fell unconscious to the ground. Zack knew it wasn't dead, and was about to step forward and finish the job when the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end. Something wasn't right; his old SOLDIER instincts told him so.

"Join us..." a voice whispered.

He quickly scanned the area for the voice, looking for any figures that were hiding among the shadows, but saw none.

"Join us!" the voice repeated, seeming to echo everywhere as if it was coming from more than one person.

"Show yourself!" Zack demanded.

"Zack?" Cloud asked as he carefully jumped down beside him.

"OUTSIDER!" the voice shouted.

Cloud flinched at the sudden voice, then readied his sword as he stood back to back with Zack.

"Sounds like you pissed them off," Zack commented as the voices continued to echo, now sounding angry.

"Any idea what's going on?" Cloud asked.

"Not a clue," he replied.

"KILL THE OUTSIDER!"

With that the voices ended, and were instantly replaced by low growling all around them. They were completely surrounded by monsters. Cloud muttered a curse, then tightened his grip on his sword as they slowly closed a circle around them.

"Got a plan?" Cloud asked him.

"You watch my back, I watch yours," he replied.

None of them showed any sign of attacking just yet; they were waiting for one of them to make the first move.

"Cloud," Zack began. "About why I've been hiding all these years..."

"Zack, I don't think now's the time-"

"No," he corrected. "Now's the perfect time."

Zack slammed the sword in the ground just for a moment to take of his gloves and flex his claws, then picked it back up. He could feel Cloud's eyes on him now.

"I'm one of them Cloud, I'm one of these things."

The nearest monster then charged at him, and all hell broke loose upon them.

_**Author's Notes**_

Ok first off I am really sorry that this has taken so long. It's been more than a month T_T I actually had this done weeks ago, but my beta reader had computer problems and had to start all over, and for the past two weeks she's been MIA. So this is unbetaed, but if I hear back from her soon I'll go back and replace this chapter with the edited version.

That being said, I may not be updating this for a little while. I have chapter 8 written, but my motivation has decreased dramatically and I can't seem to get my self to work on chapter 9. Plus I'm moving next week, getting ready for Natsucon the weekend after, possibly going to WorldCon the weekend after that, and then I start college and have to get a job.

I promise you I am not going to stop this fic or become one of those people that updates once or twice a year, I meant to finish this entirely by now and THEN take my break from writing but obviously that didn't happen. I'll update when I can, so please bear with me.

**8/7/11- **Edited ^_^


	8. VIII Answers

_**VIII Answers**_

Zack panted heavily after he had finished off the last remaining monster. For some reason, most of them had all gone for Cloud, and hadn't attacked Zack at all unless it was in self defense. It was definitely strange and had complicated things a bit, but Zack had Cloud's back covered the entire time. He could feel Cloud's eyes on him when it was over, something he'd expected. Exhausted, he leaned against the nearest wall for support, then just gave up and sat down.

"Zack?" Cloud asked worriedly.

"I'm alright," he assured him. "Just worn out."

Cloud nodded silently, trying his best to stay calm as he took in Zack's monstrous form. There was no way this could be real, it had to be some kind of nightmare. There was no way Zack could be a blood thirsty monster. Who would do such a thing to him? Then he remembered the sick bastard Hojo was, and clenched his fist. It had to be his doing.

"I was afraid of what you would think of me like this," Zack said softly.

He stood up moments later, and saw Cloud reach for his sword out of the corner of his eye. Denial, terror, fear, they were all in his eyes. Zack's heart sunk as he lowered his eyes and turned away from him.

"I can see now that this was a mistake," he muttered.

He should've just stayed dead, it would've prevented his pain. He sighed quietly to himself, then stretched his wing out so he could fly home.

Cloud saw this, and was immediately filled with regret. It wasn't Zack's fault that he ended up like this, and he was still his friend on the inside. Zack was one of his only friends back in his cadet days, the person that never blamed him when he screwed up or called him weak. The person that had saved his life and passed on his legacy to him. He was still the same on the inside, that couldn't have changed.

"Wait." he said suddenly, making Zack turn around to face him. "I'm sorry, it's just a lot to take in..."

Zack nodded, noticing that Cloud was now a little more relaxed and calm. He was trying his best to do what Kunsel did, to see past the monster before him to his old friend within. He smiled softly, glad that Kunsel had been right about this after all.

"It's alright, I kind of expected you to freak out a bit."

"Do you want me to tell Aerith anything?" Cloud asked.

He shook his head.

"No, I want to tell her myself." Zack told him.

Cloud nodded, knowing that it would be better that way. He just hoped that she would take it all well, he would hate to see Zack get his heart broken. He raised an eyebrow when Zack searched his pockets for a scrap of paper, then again for a pen. Then, after he scrawled a short note on it, he folded it neatly and handed it to Cloud.

"Could you give that to her?" he asked.

"Sure."

"Thanks."

* * *

><p>Aerith glanced at the note Cloud had given her again as she approached the church.<p>

_If you still love me, then come meet me at the church._

_-Zack _

Cloud had given her the note when he came home, and had agreed to drive her there before she ran out the door. She asked about how Zack was, wanting to know if he was alright.

"He's… changed a bit," was all he told her.

She thought about that the whole way there. She remembered how distant he had seemed the night before, not at all like the Zack she remembered. Then there was his note. It all sounded like something horrible and life changing had happened to him. Cloud obviously knew about it now, but she didn't pry about it. Zack wanted to tell her himself.

* * *

><p>Zack sat in one of the pews near the front. He had gone home to shower and change, then trusting that Cloud would pass on his message he went to the church and began to wait. Being the impatient man that he was, he began to assume the worst when she didn't show up after a few minutes. He thought that maybe she wasn't coming because she didn't love him anymore, or maybe she pressured Cloud into telling her about him and now she was afraid.<p>

He shook his head, pushing those thoughts away. He was overreacting He had faith in Cloud that he would do as he asked, and while he still wasn't entirely sure about Aerith she did seem to still care about him greatly. He stiffened when he heard the sound of a motorcycle coming close, knowing that it was probably Cloud bringing Aerith by.

_Please let her accept me__,__ too._

He couldn't remember the last time he actually prayed for something, for he wasn't that religious, but it just seemed like a good thing to do at the moment.

"Zack?"

He gulped nervously when he heard her voice followed by her soft footsteps approaching him. He glanced up at her, smiling softly as he tried his best to stay calm and collected.

"Hi, Aerith."

There was none of his old cheerfulness, and he knew that she could tell that his smile was a bit forced.

"About last night…" he began, pausing to scratch the back of his head. "I'm sorry I pushed you away and put you to sleep like that. It was stupid of me, I wasn't thinking right."

Even to him it sounded like he was making excuses, but it was the truth.

She nodded silently, knowing that there was more to the whole story.

"You might wanna sit down for this." he told her.

He poured out everything slowly. How ShinRa had pronounced him dead and hunted him down before he got back to Midgar, then dragged him back to Hojo's lab. He told her about the experiments that were done on him, then hesitantly showed her what he really was.

He lowered his eyes as he removed his gloves and showed her his wing, but he could feel her eyes on him. He heard her gasp, then he decided to glance up at her when she was silent. He saw tears fall from her eyes, and he quickly looked away. It hurt him to see her cry like that, but what hurt the most was knowing that he was the one who made it happen.

He closed his eyes tightly, regretting it all and wishing it would all go away. Then he suddenly felt her arms around him in a tight embrace and blinked.

"You're still the Zack I love," she told him.

A wave of relief swept over him after he heard those words, and he gently hugged her back. They stood there in silence for a while, both savoring the moment.

"You really accept me then?" he asked.

"Yes."

He gently pulled her closer to him as she rested her head on his chest. Neither one of them wanted to let go.

"Do you want to get back together?" she asked him.

"Yes," he answered honestly. "But I'm afraid I could snap and hurt y-"

He was cut off by her lips suddenly pressed against his. He blinked a few times, then gave in and enjoyed the kiss. He had missed the sweet warm feeling of it all, it made all his worries and fear fade away.

"Can you forgive me?" he asked when they finally broke apart.

"What for?" she asked worriedly, afraid that he was going to disappear again.

"For being an idiot all these years. I should've come to see you a long time ago."

_**Author's Notes**_

Yeah I know it's a short chapter, but I thought that was a good place to end it. Zack and Aerith are back together now, which means no more depressed Zack (he'll still have a moment or two, but that's it). Chapter nine is almost done, but at the moment I do not have internet at home (I moved for college) and I have a bunch of stuff to do before Natsucon next weekend, so it may still be a bit before the next update.


	9. IX A Changing Situation

_**IX A Changing Situation**_

"Wow," Zack commented.

It had been decided earlier in the evening that it would be best for them to all sit down and catch up, so they had all headed back to Seventh Heaven. The bar wasn't open yet, so Tifa had decided not to open it for the night so she could join them.

Zack had listened to Cloud's story patiently about what had happened after he had escaped from ShinRa, all the way up to the present. He had heard bits and pieces of what happened to Sephiroth, but hadn't heard the full story until now. There was also other good news that he was more than happy to hear; Cloud and Tifa had been married for the past two years, and now had a son of their own.

"You named him after me…?" he asked, looking at the nine month old baby in Cloud's arms.

"It just felt like a good thing to do," Cloud told him. "I hope you don't mind," he added.

Zack wasn't sure how he felt about it. Part of him felt honored and glad that his friend had done such a thing, but how would the kid feel when he got older? A lot of bad things had happened to him, and little Zackary Strife might take his name the wrong way.

"Nah, it's fine," Zack told him.

There was no use in worrying about it now. Besides, it seemed to fit him well. He had inherited Cloud's natural spiky hair, but it was dark black like Tifa's. His eyes were also a deep blue, but different from his father's mako infused ones.

"Can I hold him?" he asked.

"Sure," Cloud told him as he gently passed his son onto him.

Little Zack was just one of those babies that everyone thought was absolutely adorable. He didn't whine or cry when Cloud let him go, or freak out about being held by a stranger. Even Zack had to admit the kid was pretty cute. That, of course, that was before he reached up and clasped his tiny baby fist around the loose lock of Zack's hair and started yanking on it.

"Ow, hey!"

He knew that he couldn't really blame him since he was still very young, and while such a thing should be expected from a baby, he still didn't like it. Cloud and Aerith chuckled softly, while Zack ignored them and gently pulled his own hair out of the baby's hand and tucked it behind his ear. Unfortunately it was very stubborn, and just flipped back out into place. He groaned in annoyance, and little Zack laughed at him happily.

"You're a little stinker aren't you?" he asked.

What he got in reply was getting spit up all over his sweater.

"Thanks, kid..." he muttered sarcastically. Cloud gently took him back so he could clean him up, while Zack walked towards the bathroom to try and do the same.

* * *

><p>Time began to flow quickly for Zack. He was once again happy with his life, and everyone noticed it. Kunsel observed that his old cheerful self was back, When he commented on it, Zack simply told him that he had finally found his reason to live.<p>

Deep down he still knew and hated what he was, but since none of his friends saw him as a monster it didn't bother him much anymore. He hoped his parents would be the same way when he finally told them someday, but right now he had other things to deal with first.

More of the experiments had been popping up all over the globe, in both major cities and small towns. Zack had them plotted over one of his copies of the world map, but no matter how many times he thought and stared at it he couldn't see any kind of pattern. His last encounter with them in particular bothered him greatly. Their voices were forever in his mind, and it scared him.

He was just glad that ShinRa and WRO had gotten better at dealing with them and could now dispatch the experiments quickly and efficiently. There were less casualties every time. It was one less thing to worry about, which gave him more time to spend with Aerith.

Whenever he was with her, all his problems and worries seemed to disappear or melt away, for she really was his reason to live. They had decided to take it slow since it had been years since they had been together, and there was no reason to rush things. Most of the time he would just spend time with her and help her sell her flowers when he didn't have to work, but he had taken her out on a couple of formal dates as well.

There was one night when he was walking her home late at night when it started to rain. When it became apparent that it wasn't just a little sprinkle they ran for it, but by the time they made it back they were both completely soaked.

"You should come in and dry off, Zack," She told him.

He didn't argue with her about it. After all, even a strong Ex-SOLDIER like himself could still get sick. They both left their shoes outside by the back door, then tip-toed upstairs to the bathroom quickly so they could dry off without dripping all over the floor or waking up the kids. Aerith handed him a fresh clean towel, then gently began to undo her hair while Zack dried his.

He then peeled off his wet shirt and slung it over the shower rod so it could dry. What he really wanted to do was stretch out his sore wing, but the bathroom was small and he didn't want to risk knocking anything over or hitting Aerith in the face.

"Does it ever hurt at all?" she asked.

"Huh?"

He turned around to see her struggling to get the ribbon out of her damp and tangled hair while keeping her eyes on him.

"Your wing."

"Oh," he said. "No, not really," he told her. He watched as she continued to struggle with her wet hair. "You want some help?"

The moment he spoke was when she finally managed to get it out, tearing the thin material in the process. She frowned as she looked at the big tear that went right through the middle of the ribbon, knowing that it wasn't repairable.

"We'll go get you a new one tomorrow," he told her.

"Thanks, Zack."

She looked up and smiled at him before he gently kissed her. The world melted away as the kiss deepened, and they forgot about everything but themselves. They were the only thing that mattered at the moment. Still in their damp clothes they moved from the bathroom to her bedroom, then to the bed. It was only when he reached behind her to unclasp her bra that he stopped and realized things were moving very fast right now.

"Do you wanna stop?" he asked her.

"…yeah..." she said softly.

He nodded, then rolled over to give her some space. It was so quiet that they could both hear the rain pouring down on the roof and windows.

"Mind if I stay here until it stops?" Drying off just to get wet on the way home didn't really make sense.

"Stay as long as you want, Zack."

She moved closer to him to let him know that it wasn't as awkward as he thought, and gently rested her head on his chest. "Can we just stay like this for a while?" she asked.

He smiled and nodded, then gently wrapped his arms around her. They laid there like that for a while, and pretty soon they were both asleep.

* * *

><p><em>He and Aerith were standing together in an endless field of flowers. The bright cloudless sky was above them, and the sun was shining down upon them brightly. He smiled down at her, and gently pulled her into a deep kiss. Moments later she stiffened and quickly pulled away. He knew something was wrong when he saw the look on her face. Fear, horror, betrayal, shock, it was all in her eyes.<em>

_"Why__,__ Zack?" she asked._

_He was about to ask__ what was wrong when he felt __a__ warm liquid on his hands, and smelled the stench of blood. He glanced down__ to see fresh deep claw marks on her stomach, and her blood all over his hands._

_"Why did you hurt me?" She asked__._

_"No..." he whispered._

_He had hurt her._

_"No!"_

_He stepped away in horror as she fell to the ground. Her blood quickly flowed out of her and seeped through the flowers._

_He had killed her._

_He continued to back away from it all, trying to avoid the blood at all costs. His heel bumped into something, and he turned to see what it was. His eyes widened when he saw that it was another corpse, and he stumbled away when he realized it was Cissnei's. He turned to run only to see Luxiere's corpse was __laid out right in front of him._

_The blood was everywhere now, he could feel it squish beneath his shoes with every step. There was no getting away from it now. He closed his eyes, hoping that would make it all go away. He stiffened when he felt the cold metal of a blade against the back of his neck, and turned to see Angeal holding the Buster Sword._

_"Monster," he said flatly. _

_There was a hard__ look in his mako infused eyes, he remembered seeing it only a few times when he was ready to kill in cold blood._

_"You tarnish the SOLDIER name."_

_He didn't even have a chance to scream before the Buster Sword was brought down on him._

* * *

><p>Zack bolted upright in bed, panting and sweating heavily. When he realized it had all been a dream, he breathed a deep sigh of relief, and sank back down into the mattress. He then remembered Aerith, and hoped that he didn't disturb her, but saw her still sleeping peacefully beside him. He smiled, realizing that she was pretty cute when sleeping. She shivered a bit, so he gently pulled up the covers around her.<p>

_How can I protect her when I can hurt her so easily?_

Self control or not, accidents could happen. He tried not to think about all the possibilities of those accidents happening, but his mind often wondered when he couldn't sleep, and there was no way he would be able to go back to sleep again after that nightmare. He could tell by the silence outside that the rain had finally stopped. Upon glancing at the clock on the wall, he noticed that it was nearly dawn. He debated whether or not to just get up. He didn't want to take another chance at waking Aerith, and he didn't want to leave without saying goodbye. However, on the other hand, he didn't want to just lay there for a few more hours until everyone else got up, he didn't have the patience for that.

He decided he would just take a short walk and come back later. Maybe he would be able to get some coffee or something along the way. So he slowly lifted the covers off himself, and slipped out of the bed without waking her. She stirred a bit when he did so, but stayed asleep.

He then grabbed his now dry shirt and gloves from the bathroom and put them on, before quietly coming back to her room and giving her a quick kiss on the forehead. He then proceeded to tip toe down the hall and stairs wincing, at every little creek from the old floorboards. The last thing he wanted was for the baby to wake up.

"Zack?"

He looked up as he put his shoes on to see Cloud fully dressed and holding little sleeping Zackary in his arms.

"I didn't know you were here," he said in a soft voice so he wouldn't wake his son.

"I brought Aerith home and she said I could wait out the rain inside so we—"

"I don't need to know that much."

"…Just fell asleep," he finished. "Nothing happened between us, Cloud." He decided to leave out that something almost _did_ happen, but as Cloud had already pointed out he didn't need to know _everything._

"What about you?" he asked. "You're up awfully early."

"Just finished giving this guy a bottle a little while ago," Cloud told him. "I was just about to put him back down and do some morning training in the backyard. You're free to join me if you want."

"Sounds good to me."

Cloud smiled, then went upstairs to put Zackary to bed, and came back down with his fusion swords, as well as Zack's old Buster Sword.

"I've been meaning to give this back to you," he said as he handed it to him.

Zack smiled as he took it, for he had missed its familiar weight in his hands. He noticed there were a few minor scratches and dents from the times that Cloud had used it, but overall it still seemed in very good shape.

"Thanks for taking care of it for me."

To be honest, he had been a little worried about it. He didn't know how well Cloud handled weapons when he gave it to him, and was relieved that he didn't use it recklessly or just leave it somewhere and let it rust away.

"It was the least I could do."

Zack nodded, then followed him outside. The backyard was rather small and barren except for a few patches of grass and a few of Aerith's planted flowers by the house, but it was enough for them to spar. Zack swung his Buster Sword a few times to try and get the feel for it once more, then took his place across from his friend.

He bowed his head onto his sword respectively, then gently put it aside and caught the sword Cloud tossed to him for the match.

"Cheater," he said when he noticed Cloud was using two swords instead of one.

"You ready?" Cloud asked, completely ignoring his comment.

Zack nodded, then didn't waste a second charging at him. With two swords Cloud was easily able to block all his blows against them, but was only barely able to keep up with Zack's speed.

"Not bad," Zack said with a fierce grin as he ducked under Cloud's sword to avoid it.

His skills had certainly grown since his cadet days, that much was obvious. If he was in SOLDIER Zack had no doubt Cloud would be First Class like he was.

Cloud didn't comment, for it probably would've distracted him. Even if it was just a friendly sparring match, he wanted to be absolutely focused and looked rather serious.

Zack tucked and rolled behind him, then slashed at him from behind only for Cloud to roll away at the last moment. Cloud slammed his sword down at the ground sending a blade beam right at him, but Zack saw it coming and extended his wing so he could leap back into the air.

"Oh, NOW look who's cheating!" Cloud said, rather annoyed.

"You're just jealous that you can't fly," Zack said with a smirk.

Cloud rolled his eyes, then leapt up into the air while he was floating, and brought his sword down on him while his guard was lowered. Zack had brought up his own sword to defend himself, but was still forced back to the ground by the blow. A cloud of dust went up when they fell, then Zack felt his sword being knocked away and the tip of another being pointed to his throat.

"Dead," Cloud said flatly.

"Fine..." Zack grumbled in defeat as Cloud lowered his weapon and offered a hand to help him up. He took it and began dusting himself off once he was up and off the ground.

"I'm just getting warmed up though," he warned him.

"I could say the same thing," Cloud said with a smile.

They took their places across from each other once more, but this time Zack stuck Cloud's sword in the ground and removed his gloves.

"You should be a little more prepared to fight these monsters," Zack told him. "They're fast, strong, just want to keep killing people, and seem to be getting smarter."

"I noticed," Cloud said.

Zack sighed as he stuffed his gloves into his pocket, and looked up at his friend with serious eyes.

"Cloud, if I snap—"

"That won't happen," Cloud interrupted, knowing where this was going.

"But if I do," Zack continued, "Hold me back. Try and get me out of it, knock me out, something, anything, just don't let me hurt anyone," he told him.

He thought about asking him to take him out for good if that actually happened, but he knew that Cloud wouldn't go through with it. Even if he did, he remembered the pain he went through when he killed Angeal, he didn't want anyone of his close friends to go through that like he did.

"Just promise me that much, ok?" he asked.

"Alright," Cloud said.

Zack smiled softly, then charged at him once more without any warning. Cloud brought up his sword in front of him to defend himself, but Zack kicked it away and pinned him to the ground.

"One swipe and you're dead Cloud," Zack pointed out with his claw right above his throat. "Can't let your guard down for a second."

Cloud mentally hit himself for losing focus, but knew Zack meant well and was right. They continued to spar until the sun came up, but no matter how hard Cloud tried Zack beat him every time. By the end he was sweating and panting. Both he and Zack had taken their shirts off a while ago, but unlike Cloud Zack had barely worked up a sweat and still seemed to have energy to continue.

"You wanna call it a day?" Zack asked, noting that Cloud was worn out.

He wanted to say no and tell him that he could keep going, but he was absolutely exhausted and didn't want to push himself. If it was the real thing he would, but he knew his limits for just a simple sparing match.

"Yeah. We can finish some other time."

* * *

><p>Zack groaned as he buried his face into the table. No matter how much he stared at the map, he couldn't find any kind of pattern or clues about where the monsters suddenly popped up and attacked. It was like trying to play connect the dots with half of them missing and extra points thrown in to throw him off. He heard a knock at the door, but didn't bother getting up to answer it.<p>

"It's open," he told them.

He heard the door open, followed by the sound of Kunsel walking with his crutch.

"Any luck?" he asked as he hobbled over to him at the table.

"What do you think?" Zack asked with his face still on the table.

Kunsel sighed, then took a seat next to him. Only then did Zack look up at him and slide the map towards him so he could take a look.

"Maybe you can figure it out, you're good at these sort of things."

Kunsel studied it closely, noticing that Zack had actually done a good job at keeping track of where and when from the very beginning. First one was in Corel, then the two near Midgar the next day, followed by Kalm the day after. When Kunsel noticed there had been some in Junon, and Wutai as well the pattern became clear to him.

"ShinRa," he said.

"What?"

"Every place they've been there's been a big ShinRa related incident happen there."

_**Author's Notes**_

Ugh, over a month since an update T_T Reasons? I started college, and my beta reader had one computer problem after another (her PC is like fourteen years old or something like that). Anyway, Zackary Strife is a bit based off my adorable little baby brother in this fic, so it was based on my personal experience with babies.

I sent the next chapter to my beta about two days ago, and her laptop is fixed and working now so it shouldn't be to long, but we are both in school. I will try and get working on the final chapters, but between school, trying to get a job, cosplay stuff, and spending time with my new boyfriend it might take a little while...


	10. X Captured

_**X Captured**_

Zack blinked as he looked back at the map, and mentally smacked himself for not seeing it before.

"They're sending a message then," he said.

It was clear that they held a grudge against ShinRa, and while he couldn't really blame them, he didn't really understand why now of all times.

"You're positive that ShinRa's changed these days?" he asked.

"Yeah."

Zack sighed, then went back to studying the map a bit more to try and figure out where they would strike next. If they could just warn them to be prepared for it, then it wouldn't be much of a problem anymore. Of course if they could figure out what exactly was going on with them in the first place and stop the attacks all together that would be even better.

"Nibelheim," Kunsel said.

Just hearing the name made Zack tense up, then he remembered how he rescued Cloud from Hojo's clutches the last time he was there. He still hadn't told Cloud about it, but it looked like he had really saved him from the same fate.

"You ok?" Kunsel asked, noticing that Zack had turned a bit pale.

"Yeah," he assured him.

Knowing how Nibelheim brought up countless bad memories for Zack, he didn't press further.

"Let's just tell Tseng what we know," Zack said.

* * *

><p>Cloud yawned as he poured himself a cup of coffee. He had gotten home late the night before from his deliveries to Junon, and hadn't gotten as much sleep as he'd hoped. Little Zackary had slept through the night, which was nice, but Zack had unexpectedly stayed the night again and hadn't been too quiet this time. It was times like this when he hated having so much mako in his system. It enhanced his senses way too much.<p>

"Morning." Zack said as he cheerfully walked into the kitchen.

Cloud groaned in response, still half asleep.

"Late night?" Zack asked.

He muttered something under his breath that Zack couldn't quite make out.

"Can't hear you Cloud," Zack told him as he got himself a glass of water from the tap.

"I said, next time can you guys try and keep it down?"

He wasn't really annoyed, he sounded more disturbed, and, more than anything else, tired.

"...Oh..."Zack said, blushing slightly. "You, uh, heard all that last night?" he asked.

Cloud nodded grimly, then took a sip of his coffee. Zack had been very hesitant about getting intimate with Aerith, after all he knew how easy it would be to accidentally hurt her, but they had talked about it many times before and decided to go through with it. He had been as careful and gentle as he tried to be, and to his relief didn't harm her.

"We'll go elsewhere then next time, that way you and Tifa can get a little more privacy, too."

"Zack!" Cloud whined, turning bright red.

"What? Your son didn't come out of thin air, and we both know that in a couple years he'll probably start asking for a little brother or sister."

Cloud groaned as he shook his head. He had forgotten how annoying Zack could be, while Zack had forgotten how much fun it was to occasionally mess with him.

"Any word from Tseng yet?" he asked, changing the subject.

"Nothing," Zack told him. "It's weird, as soon as we start to figure it out they completely disappear on us."

"Maybe they're all gone," Cloud suggested.

"That's what I'd like to think, too, but they could just be messing with our heads, making us think that to let our guard down."

Cloud nodded, understanding his point.

"We can only hope that's not the case."

The last thing any of them wanted was an unexpected huge assault.

* * *

><p>"That's the last of them," Zack said as he gently put the last cardboard box of Aerith's thing down.<p>

Aerith looked up from the box she had begun unpacking and smiled at him. Living together was a big step in their relationship, but they both had been talking about it for a little while. Aerith was the one who mainly wanted to go through with it. Being apart from him for so long, she kept feeling like he could slip away and disappear right from under her fingers. While she hadn't told him about it directly, Zack could guess what she was feeling.

He was a little hesitant about it, for he had frequent nightmares about accidentally hurting her, or brutally murdering her, but he pushed them away. They terrified him, made him want to distance himself from her, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. It would be too cruel for both of them.

"I got you something," he said as he gently hugged her from behind.

"Oh you didn't have to do that, Zack," she said.

"You'll like it, trust me," he assured her. "It's outside in the back."

She raised an eyebrow, wondering what it could be. She took his hand as he led her outside, and once they were there Zack covered her eyes with his hands. She trusted him, so she led him carefully lead her around the building and didn't try and peak out.

"Ok," he said cheerfully as he took his hands off of her face. "You can look now."

She gasped as she saw that Zack had not only completely repaired her old flower wagon, but repainted it to make it look nicer. The main part of the wood was a clean smooth white, while the trim and wheels were a nice calm golden yellow. For the finishing touch he had taken some thick/durable pink fabric and tied large neat bows around it.

"You like it?" he asked.

"It's beautiful!" she said as she tightly hugged him in thanks. "I love it, thank you, Zack."

He smiled at her, glad that she liked it much better than she did before. He leaned down to kiss her, when of course his phone rang. He groaned in annoyance, but pulled it out of his pocket to see who it was.

"It's Tseng, I better get it."

She nodded, and he went inside.

"Any news?" he asked.

"There still hasn't been any sign of them, but there's something I thought you should know."

Zack tensed up a bit, he didn't like the hint of worry in Tseng's voice. He had a feeling that this wasn't good news.

"What is it?" he asked ,not really sure if he wanted to know.

"Kunsel's gone missing."

Zack paled and tensed. He had just seen Kunsel a couple days ago.

"For how long?" he asked.

"Three days."

The same day Zack had seen him last. He didn't like this.

"Has anyone gone out and looked for him?"

"We tried, but couldn't find any traces."

Zack groaned in frustration and hung up without any warning. Just when he had finally started to settle down and enjoy some peace, this disaster struck. He hated it. He shoved his phone back into his pocket and banged his fist into the wall in frustration.

"Zack?" Aerith asked worriedly as she came inside.

"Kunsel's gone missing," he told her. "I should go look for him."

He hated leaving her like this. They had planned to go out and celebrate her moving in with a nice quiet romantic dinner and maybe snuggle up on the couch with a movie after, but now that wasn't going to happen.

"I'm sorry, Aerith," he apologized.

"No, it's ok," she said, trying not to sound too disappointed. She had gotten used to this kind of thing when Zack was in SOLDIER, back then he had to cancel whenever something unexpected came up and he had to leave. "This is more important anyway."

He nodded, glad she understood.

"I'll make it up to you another night," he told her.

"Just be careful."

He nodded and quickly gave her a quick kiss, then took a minute to gather his Buster Sword and some materia before heading out the door.

* * *

><p>"You're sure?" Cloud asked him over the phone.<p>

"Not completely, but there's only one way to find out. I just don't wanna go in there alone."

"Alright, I'll be there in a bit."

Cloud hung up his phone, then turned to a worried looking Tifa holding little Zackary in her arms.

"Zack needs me for something."

He didn't want to tell her all the details, that Zack somehow had figured out where exactly they were experimenting on the missing SOLDIERs and turning them into monsters, and now they were gonna check it out. Knowing all that would make her worry too much, so he wanted to keep it simple.

"You'll be careful, won't you?" she asked.

Ever since he had almost died after the his last fight with Sephiroth, she worried about him every time he left. He understood where she was coming from, and didn't blame her one bit.

"Yeah, I'll be back soon."

He gave her a quick kiss on the cheek, followed by a soft kiss on his son's forehead.

"Daddy will be back soon, ok?" he told him.

He couldn't talk yet except for the frequent baby babbling every baby did, and while Cloud wasn't sure if he completely understood him, but little Zack waved goodbye when Cloud did the same.

* * *

><p>The ShinRa building was an absolute mess on the outside, and while it didn't look that bad from a distance at night, Cloud could see that it was falling apart at the seams when he pulled up to it on Fenrir. The attack from WEAPON had completely destroyed the last few floors, and more damage had been done from his last fight with Sephiroth and the remnants, but the most damage was done on the assault when Deep Ground was still around.<p>

"Why would they be here?" he thought to himself out loud.

"Think about it," Zack said from behind, startling him. "I take out the monster in the Corel area and then that night three show up around here. I think we're close to the source."

"But didn't the WRO search every inch of ShinRa after Deep Ground?" Cloud asked.

"Yeah," Zack said, knowing full well that was true since he had taken part in it, "but that was a while ago. Whoever is pulling the strings could've gotten the labs up and running again somehow."

Cloud nodded, seeing that he had a good point.

"So what's the plan?" he asked, hoping that Zack had one for once.

"Sneak in through the back and see if anything's active or anyone's home. If there is, we'll get some answers one way or another."

"And if not?"

"We go home and think of other possibilities."

Zack hoped that it wouldn't be the case. Kunsel's humanity was on the line, and time was against him. He needed to find the answers quick, and he needed to be right about this.

_Just hang on Kunsel... _he thought as they began to climb the back stair way in darkness.

They were both thankful for their mako vision that allowed them to see in the dark much better than the average person, but even then they still couldn't rush because of the frequent broken step.

"This is taking too long," Zack said in annoyance a few minutes later, seeing that they were only on the tenth floor.

Then he got an idea, and looked back at Cloud.

"Do you still get motion sickness?" he asked.

"Not really, why?"

Before Cloud could protest Zack picked him up by the waist as he spread his wing and began to fly up the stairs at top speed. They were at the end within seconds. Zack gently set his friend down, who wobbled a bit from dizziness, but was otherwise fine.

"A little more warning next time, please!"

"Sorry," Zack said as he opened the stairway door and poked his head out.

The hallway was completely silent and deserted, but the lights that were still working were on. A few of them flickered, and one was hanging out and dangling by a few wires that looked like they could snap at any moment.

"Power's on up here," he told him as he opened the door and stepped out into the hall and scanned the area as he took off his gloves.

"It's too quiet," Cloud commented as he stepped out with a tight grip on his sword.

Zack nodded in agreement, his old SOLDIER instincts telling him that something wasn't right. He felt a sudden sting in his arm, and quickly realized that he had been hit by a tranquilizer. He pulled it out as fast as he could, but already he could feel its effects.

_Damn._

They had walked right into a trap. He heard Cloud call out his name as two more were fired at them both from their hidden enemies. He heard Cloud fall to the floor unconscious right before he did, and saw two pairs of footsteps slowly approaching him before everything slowly faded to black.

_**Author's Notes**_

Another late update T_T But it's almost time for my plot twist *crazy Hojo laugh* Anyway, chapter 11 is about half way done, and I could probably finish it soon, but my friend introduced me to Chrono Cross and I've mainly been playing that in my free time *Sweatdrop* Square makes good games, and man are they addicting...


	11. XI Revelations

_**XI Revelations**_

Zack groaned as he slowly drifted back into consciousness. He recalled the final moments before he blacked out quickly, and took in is surroundings. He discovered quickly that both his hands and feet were hand cuffed to the chair that held him, and when he tried to break them with his strength he received an electric shock.

He gritted his teeth as he bit back a scream. They had been made to be SOLDIER proof, of that much he was certain of. He glanced around the room to see if there was something he could use to help him get out, or if there was any sign of Cloud. It was nearly pitch black, and even with his mako enhanced vision the outline of the closed door was the only thing he could make out. He didn't have a single clue where he was in the building, or if it was even the same building he'd entered earlier. Where was Cloud? How long had he been out? Minutes? Hours? Days? Too many questions with too few answers.

"Cloud?" he called, hoping that he would answer if he was in a room nearby. "Cloud, can you hear me?"

He didn't get an answer, But moments later the door swung open, the bright light from the hallway beyond blinding him." He looked away and blinked so his eyes would adjust.

"So you're awake."

His eyes widened in recognition of the, and immediately turned to look at him in the light.

"Genesis?" he asked in disbelief. "You're a part of this?"

He refused to believe his eyes. It was true that Genesis had done terrible things in the past when he waged war against ShinRa, but that was all because of Hollander and the degradation. All he had really wanted then was to stop the process and go on with his life. The Goddess herself had seen that and saved him. Zack had thought for sure that he would be on the road to redemption, there had to be a logical explanation otherwise.

He watched as Genesis slowly smiled, then chuckled lightly as he approached him.

"The Genesis you know is long gone, Zack."

As he stepped closer to Zack, the light hit him just right for Zack to see that his eyes weren't his normal Mako infused blue, but rather green and resembled Sephiroth's all too well. He stiffened at the sight of them, and remembered Cloud mentioning that Sephiroth had been able to control some of the people that had Jenova cells planted inside them. He was dead, that much was true, but apparently that didn't stop him from making Genesis his next victim.

"Sephiroth." Zack spat as he narrowed his eyes coldly at him. "What do you want?"

"What I've always wanted, Zack," he said as he began to pace around him. "The destruction of this planet." It was then when he stopped, and smiled as he gazed at him. "And you're going to help me."

"Like hell I would!"

"Oh, you will Zackary, whether you like it or not."

He then took out a radio out of his pocket, clicked it on, and spoke three words into it that immediately caught Zack's attention:

"Kill the Cetra."

At first, Zack thought he was bluffing and just trying to trick him. After all, Aerith was safe and sound at home. But she was alone, he had left her unprotected and vulnerable. His eyes widened in panic when he realized that she could indeed be held by him as well, completely defenseless. He flinched when he heard her brief scream, followed by a gunshot a moment later.

"NO!" he screamed.

That moment continued to play over in his mind, even after Genesis had clicked the radio off and left the room. Aerith was dead. She would no longer laugh or cry, and he would no longer be able to comfort her or hold her close.

_No..._

Guilt overtook his sadness. It was his fault, he had been the one who left her completely alone, he couldn't do anything to save her.

He clenched his fists, he hated himself for it, but he hated Sephiroth more. He wanted to make him pay, he wanted to rip him apart slowly and painfully until he bled to death. His hatred sparked the anger and rage deep within him, and soon that was all there was left in his mind. Just him and getting his revenge.

"I'LL KILL YOU!" he shouted, breaking free of his bonds instantly with his strength before the pain got to him.

Nothing would stand in his way. His rage had completely taken over.

* * *

><p>Aerith couldn't remember much of her capture. She had been at home unpacking her things, trying to keep her mind off worrying about Zack. She had been so distracted, she hadn't noticed the shady figure coming in through one of the open windows. They grabbed her from behind and covered her mouth before she could scream. She tried to struggle, but they cast sleep on her before she could get away.<p>

When she opened her eyes, she found herself in one of the cells in the old ShinRa building. Her hands and feet were tied together loosely, but when she saw an armed Genesis copy guarding her she thought twice about trying to get free.

It was only moments later when the door opened and Cloud was thrown in with her. He too was restrained, but with sturdy SOLDIER proof handcuffs. He was unconscious, but the impact of landing on the floor woke him up.

He quickly took in his surroundings as he awkwardly pushed himself up into a sitting position. He stiffened in surprise when he saw Aerith, but didn't say anything because of the guard. He narrowed his eyes at him, vaguely remembering the war with Genesis and his copies from his cadet days. He saw that the copy was armed, and kept his eyes on him iat all times. Cloud knew he probably had the keycard to get out on him, and even though he himself was unarmed, he could still take him down if he had some sort of distraction.

One thing bothered him though. Where was Zack? They had obviously separated them on purpose, and the fact that they had also gone through the trouble to kidnap Aerith and bring her here put a bad feeling in his gut. He didn't know what they were planning, but he didn't like it.

It was then when they heard static from the copy's radio and all of them turned their attention to it.

"Kill the Cetra," said a voice on the other end.

Cloud's eyes widened, while Aerith completely froze with fear beside him. The moment the copy drew his gun, Cloud leapt into action and kicked it out of his hand. Aerith let out a short scream as it went off, while Cloud jumped up and awkwardly kicked him in the face. He lost in balance in the end and fell face first to floor, but the copy was out cold for time being.

"Are you alright?" he asked Aerith as he sat up once more.

She nodded silently, still in shock.

"Can you untie yourself at all?"

She nodded, and with a little effort was able to shake the loose rope from her wrists before removing the ones around her ankles.

"See if he has anything for these handcuffs."

She went over to him cautiously, then seeing that he was indeed unconscious and not faking it to catch them off guard she began to go through his pockets. She found a keycard and grabbed that first, but found nothing for Cloud's handcuffs. She frowned and shook her head at him.

Cloud sighed, then took a deep breath before he tried to pull them apart. Less than a second later he received an unexpected electric shock from them and gritted his teeth. Aerith flinched when she saw, and looked at Cloud worriedly.

"Don't hurt yourself!" she pleaded.

"I have to get out of these somehow, Aerith."

But he knew she was right. The harder he pulled, the more intense the shocks got. Even if he managed to break them apart he would be completely drained afterwards, and he would need his energy to get them both out of here and find Zack.

He closed his eyes as he sighed, and leaned back against the metal base of the cot as he tried to think of a plan. He decided to give the handcuffs one more try, and pulled as hard as he could. Luckily for him, the metal near them shorted them out and he was able to break the handcuffs them apart. He sighed from relief, then stood up and grabbed the guard's gun.

"Stay close to me, okay Aerith?"

She nodded, and Cloud opened the cell door with the hand gun in his hands, ready for action. He preferred swords over guns a lot more, but remembered how to use them well from his cadet days. He hoped his aim was still as good as it had been back then.

The two guards standing right outside saw him at once, but Cloud jumped into action before they even had the chance to draw their weapons. He shot the first one in the head and watched it fall to the floor, then quickly spun around and elbowed the other in the stomach before putting a bullet between its eyes.

He scanned the area for more he would have to deal with, but saw none. Seeing that they were on the SOLDIER floor he guessed that their equipment would be held in the materia room locked up tight, and quickly led Aerith there. There was another copy guarding it, so he assumed that he was right and took care of him the same way he'd taken care of the ones before.

"As soon as I get my equipment back, we'll look for Zack," he told Aerith.

Getting it back, though, was still going to be a problem for him. The room was locked, and he remembered how it was pretty much impossible to get in without a key card. He was never in SOLDIER, but he had asked Zack to teach him a little bit about using materia one time. It was their rotten luck that Zack had lost his key card that day, and he had tried everything to get into the room from smashing the key pad to breaking down the wall, but both were extremely durable to prevent anyone from breaking in, even SOLDIERs.

Cloud sighed as he looked up at the vents in the ceiling. Had Zack tried crawling through those back then? He didn't remember, parts of his memory were still fuzzy. He decided to give it a shot.

"I'll be back in a minute, Aerith," he said before he jumped up and grabbed a hold of the grate.

"Wait, Cloud!"

But he had already yanked it off and crawled inside. It took him less than a minute to find where the vent led into the room, so he tore off the grate there, then hopped inside. A small cloud of dust blew up around where he landed, suggesting that it wasn't inhabited in a while. The shelves that once held the materia for the SOLDIERSs to use were now empty, but in the corner laid his sheath and swords, as well as Zack's. He slid them both into his sheath after putting it on, grabbed their materia, and was about to head back into the vents when the door slid open.

Expecting copies he spun around with his sword drawn, only to see it was Aerith with a key card in her hands.

"It was on the guard, Cloud," she told him.

"..."

He felt like an idiot for not checking to see what that guard had had on him first, but what was done was done. They both flinched at the sound of gunfire coming further down the hall, and assumed that Zack had also broken out of his cell.

"Stay behind me, Aerith," Cloud told her as he cautiously moved towards the sound of combat.

Something about it bothered him greatly though. There was no doubt that Zack could handle them even without a weapon, but something just didn't seem right. He poked his head around the corner where most of the chaos seemed to be coming from and stiffened.

Blood was splattered everywhere, and the corpses of Genesis copies were scattered about, but what startled him the most was seeing Zack in the middle of it all. He was on all fours crouched down with his claws and wing out, and attacked anyone who came near him. None of the copies had been able to lay a scratch on him no matter how hard they tried. He had snapped, and now nothing was stopping him from endlessly killing people.

Aerith gasped when she saw him, then quickly looked away, not wanting to watch. She was about to ask Cloud what they were going to do now, when she saw him reaching for his sword.

"Cloud, no!" she pleaded.

"I'm not gonna hurt him," he assured her. "I'm gonna try and get him to calm down."

She nodded silently, hoping that he would succeed without getting hurt as well. Cloud slowly drew his sword as he walked towards his friend, ready to defend himself when he attacked.

"Zack," he said, getting a low warning growl in response. "Snap out of it!" he shouted.

He sprang at him a moment later, and while Cloud quickly brought up his sword in front of him to defend himself Zack was still able to dig his claws into his shoulder. He gritted his teeth as he forced down a scream, and shoved Zack back into a wall.

"Remember who you are, Zack!" he pleaded. "You're not a monster!"

But Cloud's voice didn't reach him. He counter attacked and sent Cloud's sword flying. Before he could blink Zack had him on the ground, and was about to spring at him once more to deliver the final blow when Aerith screamed. The sound of her voice got to him, and he hesitated. She saw this, and very slowly began to walk towards him.

"Aerith, no!" Cloud told her, panicking when he saw what she was doing.

But she ignored him and kept walking towards him.

"Zack," she pleaded softly. "Please, come back to us."

He growled at her as a warning as she got closer, but made no moves to attack. When she got close enough, she knelt down and gently wrapped her arms around him, hoping to calm him.

"Please," she whispered.

She saw the anger and hatred slowly fade from his eyes, and confusion quickly replace them as he was brought back to his senses.

"Aerith?" he asked softly.

She sighed from relief, then smiled at him as she hugged him tighter.

"I'm here," she assured him.

For a moment he thought for sure that he was dreaming, but feeling her warm embrace convinced him otherwise. He frowned when he saw that Cloud was slightly injured, and while part of him wanted to look around to see what other damage he had done while he was out of it, the rest of him didn't want to know.

Both he and Cloud heard footsteps approaching, and quickly found themselves surrounded by the few remaining copies ready to open fire on them. Cloud had already cast cure on his wound, and didn't waste any time snatching up his sword, while Zack took priority of protecting Aerith over himself.

He gently shoved her to the ground as they open fired on them, and shielded her with his body. He bit down a scream as the bullets tore through his flesh. He heard Cloud cry out his name, and Aerith gasp beneath him.

"Are you ok?" he asked her weakly through the pain.

The gunfire had stopped, so he assumed Cloud had finished taking care of them. Aerith didn't answer. He felt her blood on his hands and automatic panicked. Had she been hit?

"Aerith?" he asked, starting to feel dizzy from his own blood loss.

He heard Cloud call out to him again as he made his way over to them, but it sounded far away. He pulled his hands away from her to find out that he had accidentally dug her claws into her when he had pushed her.

_No._

She was bleeding badly, and it was all his fault. He vaguely heard Cloud say something to him, but couldn't make it out. Aerith was dying, all because of him.

"I'm sorry..." he muttered as he began to drift into unconsciousness.

The last thing he saw before the darkness overtook him was her slowly bleeding to death.

_**Author's Notes**_

Another long wait T_T Sorry about that, and I know you guys probably hate me right now for the cliffhanger, and even more when I tell you there's only one chapter left. However that one chapter is almost done, and I promise you I will have it up by the end of the year ^_^ Happy Holidays everyone!


	12. XII Live, Life, Love

_**XII Live, Life, Love**_

Aerith sighed to herself as she walked into the hospital room. It had been a little over a month since the incident at the old ShinRa building, and things had finally calmed down. After Zack had passed out, Cloud had called for help, and gotten both him and Aerith to the hospital in time.

While Zack had dug his claws into Aerith, the cuts weren't severe; she had just lost some blood and passed out from shock. Her injures had healed within a few weeks, but she would forever have a few thick scars on her back.

Zack, on the other hand, had lapsed into a coma. The bullets he took weren't fatal, and while the doctors had been able to remove all of them and patch him up, he still showed no signs of waking up, even long after he had healed up. In fact, he seemed to just get worse. With time, they all began to see that he was slowly slipping away with each passing day, and they didn't know why.

Kunsel figured it out though. He had managed to get out during the chaos that Zack had distracted the copies with, and since he had just been bait to lure Zack, he was unharmed. He remembered that, before Zack had gotten back together with Aerith, he had told him that he had nothing to live for. Now Zack thought he had killed the woman he loved, and his reason to live along with her. With no will to live anymore, he was slowly slipping away.

Aerith came and visited him every day. She would sit by his bed for hours as she talked to him and held his hand, hoping that her voice would reach him and bring him back. Cloud and Kunsel also popped in once and a while to see how he was doing, but even while they worried and cared about him, their main priority was hunting down Genesis, for he had vanished once more.

"Please, Zack," she said softly as she gently squeezed his hand. "Won't you come back to me?"

He had gotten so weak that he had been placed on life support. . Everyone knew that it wouldn't be long before he slipped away into the lifestream, but no one would admit it.

"Losing you once was bad enough!" she said as her tears began to fall. "Please don't make me go through that again..."

She cried her heart out that day, and soon fell asleep at his bed side, still holding his hand.

* * *

><p><em>"Zack..."<em>

_He heard many muffled voices as he drifted between life and death, but that one in particular stood out to him.__He felt tired and heavy, but as the voice grew louder and the rest of them faded away__,__ he slowly felt his strength returning._

_"Wake up__,__ Zack__,__" the voice said._

_He slowly opened his eyes and blinked a few times when he saw Angeal standing over him with his white wing spread out._

_"Angeal__…__?" he asked. _

_He smiled down at him and offered a hand to help him up. Confused and a million questions rolling through his head, he took it and pulled himself up. He took a look around, and saw they were surrounded __by a seemingly endless space of white. There was nothing in sight. _

_"Am I dead?" he asked._

_"No," Angeal answered. "But you're close."_

_He guessed that was why he had felt so weak before; because he was getting closer to death now._

_"Is Aerith here too?" he asked, his heart heavy when he remembered that he had killed her._

_But Angeal looked confused._

_"Aerith?" he asked._

_"She died..." he explained softly as he glanced down."Right before I lost consciousness..."_

_He hoped that Angeal wouldn't ask how__,__ of all things. More than anything__,__ he wanted to find her and beg for her forgiveness for what he did._

_"She's not here__,__ Zack."_

_That caught his attention and he glanced back up._

_"What does that mean then?" he asked, his heart racing._

_"It means that she's still alive__,__" Angeal told him with a smile. "And that you shouldn't be here just yet."_

_He patted Zack on the shoulder, __earning him a small smile from the younger man. _

_"Thanks__,__ Angeal."_

_"Just remember: We're SOLDIER's, not monsters..."_

_Zack nodded, and watched as everything slowly began to fade out..._

He awoke in his hospital bed, and smiled when he saw that Aerith had fallen asleep in the chair beside him. He gently squeezed her hand, then reached up to move a lock of hair out of her face.

"Aerith..." he whispered weakly. His voice was horse, and his entire body felt heavy. It made him wonder how close to death he actually had been...

She woke up a few moments later, and gasped when she saw that he was awake. Her eyes watered with tears of joy, and he knew if it wasn't for all the IVs in his arms and his weak state she would've hugged him tightly right then and there.

"I'm back," he assured her as he wiped her tears away.

* * *

><p>"You're sure?"<p>

Aerith nodded silently as Zack took it all in. It had been a few weeks since his steady recovery, and their lives had once again returned to normal. While Zack was in his coma, ShinRa had sent out most of their SOLDIERs to find Genesis and finish him off. They found him in the ruins of Banora, but there was no need to finish him off as ordered, for he was already dead. They weren't sure what exactly had happened, but judging by the way that he had stabbed himself to death, they guessed that the real Genesis had regained control and decided that his death was for the best.

The threat was gone. None of the experiments or Genesis copies remained, so everyone was able to continue living peacefully once more. Zack had returned home with Aerith, and continued to take on mercenary work, as well as help out Cloud on some of his deliveries when he had too much of a work load for him to handle.

He also spent as much time with Aerith as possible, for the feeling of almost losing her had been too much for him to bear. It was then when she told him, for he needed to know.

"I want this child Zack," she said softly.

"I know," he said, still staying in his chair. "It's just..."

He was terrified. Would their child be born like him? When they grew up would they accept him for what he was? Would he be a good father? Each question brought more anxiety, and fear along with it.

"I figured we'd at least be married first before we started thinking about a family," he told her, not wanting her to see his fears.

She nodded, understanding where he was coming from. They had both been careful, but it was clear that nothing was perfect.

"We could move the wedding up," she suggested as she nervously turned the silver engagement ring on her finger.

Almost losing her also made Zack realize that he indeed wanted to spend the rest of his life with Aerith. They had planned to have a long engagement, but now it looked like their plans would have to change a bit.

He smiled at her as he finally stood up, and gently pulled her into a tight embrace before placing a kiss on her lips.

"We'll make this work," he promised.

It did work out well for them, as Zack promised. The church was fixed up for the wedding a couple months later, where everyone was there and happy to see them finally getting married. Tifa was Aerith's maid of honor, with Yuffie and Marlene as her bridesmaids. Naturally, Cloud was the best man, and with Denzel helping him walk down the aisle, little Zackary was the ring bearer.

It was a simple wedding, with a short ceremony and a small reception, but that was the way they both wanted it. Zack took her to Costa Del Sol for their honey moon, and spent some time with Zack's parents in Gongaga afterwards.

It was then when Zack and Aerith told both of them that they were expecting a child, and immediately they were both overjoyed about having a grandchild. Zack also decided it was time that they stopped being kept in the dark about what had happened to him.

He sat them both down at the kitchen table, and slowly told them what happened in Nibelheim. He left out all the horrendous details of the experiments and his time on the run, for he didn't want them to know how bad it had truly been for him. They both listened silently, but as he went on the color in their faces slowly drained. When he finished, he slowly took off his leather gloves and stretched out his wing to show them both that he was telling the truth.

"I'm sorry..." he apologized as he stared down at the floor.

He wasn't exactly sure what he was apologizing for, but he felt that it needed to be said. It wasn't his fault he ended up the way he did, but now here he was, making them realize the truth. He had hid it from them for so long. He had run off to join SOLDIER and they hadn't stopped him. It wasn't his fault, nor theirs, and he hoped they would see it the same way.

Guilt weighed him down when he heard his mom begin to cry, then he flinched and looked up when he heard his father slam his fist down on the table. Tears were in his eyes too, but anger overpowered them.

"This is ShinRa's doing, isn't it? I'm not going to just sit here until they pay for what they've done to you!"

Zack's heart skipped a beat. ShinRa may have changed, but something like that was not going to end well with anybody.

"Dad, no!" he pleaded.

"Zack's right, it's not a good idea," Aerith chimed in.

"Besides, I've accepted it, I'm still human," he assured them.

"And what about the child?" he asked.

"I...We don't know..." Zack said quietly as he started back at the floor as Aerith gently squeezed his hand. "But we'll love them all the same."

* * *

><p>As Aerith's due date grew closer, Zack began to take on less jobs that were far away, so he could be by her side in case anything happened. She was glad that Zack was close, and seemed to get happier about becoming a mother with each passing month. Zack, on the other hand, began to panic a bit more about all the "what ifs" each day. He, too, was happy about getting to be a father, but was also becoming very stressed.<p>

He knew it wasn't healthy to keep everything bottled up inside, so he poured it all out to Cloud, hoping he would understand at least some of what he was going through. He listened, and did understand some of the stress, for he too had been worried about being a good father when Tifa was pregnant.

Zack felt better when he realized that he wasn't completely alone, but he was still worried about his child being different than the rest. He thought about going to a couple of ShinRa's scientists and allowing them to run some harmless tests to see if the experiments were genetic in any way, but he still didn't trust them just yet.

More relief was provided when the doctor said their child was developing normally and healthily, but the pit of worry still remained.

He was by her side when she went into labor, and held her hand and whispered words of encouragement until it was all over.

"You have a healthy baby girl," the doctor said before he handed their newborn over to them, wrapped in a warm blanket.

Zack sighed from relief and sank back into his chair when he realized that she was indeed completely normal. No claws or little wings in sight, just a cute, small, little baby girl with a head full of black hair and green eyes. All his fears and worries melted away.

"She's beautiful," he said as he gently leaned over next to Aerith to get a closer look at her. "Like our own little angel."

"That'd be a good name for her," Aerith suggested as she gently rocked her to sleep in her arms.

"You sure you don't want to go with Ifalna?" he asked, remembering they had been considering that one if it was a girl.

"That could be her middle name: Angel Ifalna Fair."

Zack nodded, liking the sound of it.

"Angel it is," he said with a smile."

It was that moment when he realized that nothing really mattered to him, except for the two of them. It didn't matter if he was completely human or if he forgave ShinRa. He was Zack Fair, Ex-SOLDIER, mercenary, a husband and now a father. This was his life, and he was going to live it out no matter what.

_~FIN~_

_**Author's Notes**_

Here's the last chapter as promised ^_^ A nice wrapped up happy ending for you. However, as I have already told some of you I will probably do a sequel at somepoint. At the moment though I have no solid plot ideas (ideas welcome!) and I'd like to work on some other fics first. I'd like to give out a nice big thank you to **Chibipinkbunnny, Shippudenfanfic, and Zythxx** all for helping me on this story. I also broke my longest word count! ^_^ I hoped everyone liked it, and will check out some of my other stories.

**THE POLL FOR A SEQUEL IS NOW ON MY PROFILE**


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